Stress relief

Donfitz007

Kingfisher
So a couple days ago I bought some high quality stress relief pills. I think they’re called Zen and Mind from Wellpath. I heard pretty much nothing but good reviews about them. However it seems every time I take them, the stress gets worse and I find myself crying like a little bitch (1. I haven’t cried in Atleast 7 years previous to taking these. 2.it might be due to depression) anyway I have the same problem with other supplements like melatonin that wakes me up and gives me insomnia or crazy nightmares.

So I’m here asking what do you guys do to relieve stress, my go to is usually the gym but I’ve been so depressed that my workouts have suffered drastically. I gave up porn months ago, gave up social media a week ago, my girlfriend JUST cheated on me and I ghosted her so the stress from her is leaving(slowly) cigars and whiskey usually make me happy but I’m too broke at the moment to afford it.

I’m trying my hardest not to just wallow in pain, but gaming girls seems like a fools errand and brings me more pain than happiness at the moment. So if you have any suggestions please help.
 
Sounds like you are somewhat deep down and have alot to work on. You dont mention WHY you are stressed, maybe you dont even know?

When it comes to stress, meditation is known to be the best long term solution, do small steps, maybe only 5 minutes a day and see how it goes. If you are having serious issues with stress and depression, it is best to see a doctor.

Dont bother with girls now, work on yourself first.
 
I have a few bits of advice. These some of the things that have kept me sane during rough times:

1. Remember that everything in our earthly life is temporary. In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius explained it like this: life is a rushing river. And sometimes we find people or things next to us, but the current will pull them away eventually.

2. You've got to keep doing the thing that are good for you, whether your heart is in it or not. Keep praying when you can't tell that God is listening. Keep going to the gym when the workouts seem pointless. Keep eating, sleeping, and working at the appropriate times. Keep doing what you need to.

3. Realize that some situations are shitty, and you're going to feel shitty for a while. It's not a mental illness; it's not something you have to fight against; it's just a part of life. And if you keep doing what you need to, it will pass eventually. The bad times are just as temporary as the good times.

4. Spend time around people. With friends is best, but even being around strangers is better than staying at home when you're sad. If you sit alone in your apartment and wallow in grief, it won't go away. If I'm feeling down I'll read at the library instead of my living room; anything to be around people.
 

LINUX

Ostrich
Gold Member
Hang in there Donfitz.

Remember you have family and friends that love you and whether you know it or not, they need you around.

I am not going to give you advice on stress because I'm not a hypocrite that pretends to have it all figured out. I have tons of stress myself and no amount of meditating, god, or focusing on the good things and seeing how good I have it compared to others, has ever helped me.

Wherever you go, there you are. Once one problem dissolves that you've been stressing about for years, another one will surely come say hello the next day.

But I will say this and I hope you listen. Don't start taking sleeping pills and benzos to shut the lights off at night and calm the storm. If you think stopping booze and drugs are demons, getting hooked on sleeping meds for several years is very well shaking hands with the devil himself.
 

Donfitz007

Kingfisher
Thanks guys for the help! Ironically things have gotten MUCH better once I stopped taking the "stress" pills. Sadly out of all the things stressing me out the main cause is the fact that my ex (the woman that I saw almost every day for 3 months) is letting another guy live with her. With that said I am planning on doing a self-assessment and evaluation of this relationship and come up with a plan to do better and better myself.


Also I found icing my back/knees/ and giving my feet an ice bath really calms me down, reading while doing so was the highlight of my day. I might add that to my daily routine.

Again thanks again for the help guys!
 

tomzestatlu

Kingfisher
My biggest advice is to RATIONALIZE everything.

You must realize, that what´s going on with your head is just about your ego. It´s not broken heart or whatever, she just broke your ego, because she has done the worst thing she can do to man´s ego.
That´ s it, detach your mind from your ego and look at the situation from another man´s perspective. What would you say to him? Probably, that 3 months means nothing and if she did such thing, he´s actually happy person to be without her.

Did you do anything bad? No. She cheated on you after 3 fcking months, she had probaly done it before and she will do it in the future again for sure.

At this moment, it sucks and accept is as a fact, it´s just going to suck for some period. But try to look at it from your whole life´s perspective. Imagine you are 70 years old and think about these short 3 months, that mean nothing from long-term. Imagine yourself 70 years old only laughing to your present self, why did you give so many fcks about that.

I know you mentioned, that your gym routine sucks now, but keep pushing as hard as possible. Instead of going to gym everyday, go to gym everyday plus go also for a run everyday. Use your bad feeling towards yourself as fuel to get yourself into best shape in your lifetime and other positive things as better self-esteem will follow.

I can let this this one girl change my life, ending my journey to be a play right then or I can barell through this silure to reach the next success, which I am one gigantic step closer to achieving.
 
Play a sport, individual or team. Team sports are great because they give you a sense of belonging and meaning and allow you to feel like you are contributing to some larger purpose or goal. Playing sports and winning them Will increase testosterone. That helps.

Walks are also really good, long walks. They are great for relieving tension and allowing you to free think. That is why Steve Jobs and other people in Silicon Valley were so fond of walking, much less having walking meetings. The nature component is crucial too.

Diet can help especially if you eat lots of fresh and unprocessed foods and reduce your sugar. I myself am a huge fan of cooking meals from start to finish beacuse it gives me a sense of accomplishment and also in some strange way is a bit relaxing.
 

fktax

Sparrow
Dude I just bought a $12 hammock from Aliexpress. You have no idea how stress relieving it is to just chill out and look up at the sky. Thanks China!
 

Zenta

Woodpecker
Gold Member
fktax said:
Dude I just bought a $12 hammock from Aliexpress. You have no idea how stress relieving it is to just chill out and look up at the sky. Thanks China!

I think being outdoors in the case of the hammock is key. I had ordered one of those standalone indoor hammock stands + hammock from amazon over a year ago for $90 and I've used it a handful of times before finally selling it last week. Luckily every woman on facebook market place wanted an indoor hammock and I only took a $20 loss on it. However I found laying on a hammock inside did absolutely nothing for me and trying to sleep on it was null as I found it very uncomfortable for that no matter how many different positions I tried. Camping in the woods with one may be different experience.
 

roberto

Pelican
Gold Member
Zenta said:
fktax said:
Dude I just bought a $12 hammock from Aliexpress. You have no idea how stress relieving it is to just chill out and look up at the sky. Thanks China!

I think being outdoors in the case of the hammock is key. I had ordered one of those standalone indoor hammock stands + hammock from amazon over a year ago for $90 and I've used it a handful of times before finally selling it last week. Luckily every woman on facebook market place wanted an indoor hammock and I only took a $20 loss on it. However I found laying on a hammock inside did absolutely nothing for me and trying to sleep on it was null as I found it very uncomfortable for that no matter how many different positions I tried. Camping in the woods with one may be different experience.

You need a proper hammock, not a pretend hammock with spreader bars. And yes, outdoors is much better.
 
Hammocks are great especially if you're on a college campus. You can set them up between trees and chill out on the quad, as girls wonder what you're up to in amazement. It's a great conversation starter. Add a guitar to the mix and you're golden.
 

Donfitz007

Kingfisher
Thanks again guys for all the help. I think I need to get my Test levels checked.

BAckground (skippable)
I saw the girl today cause I thought if I ___ her one last time it'll help. It helped in the physical sense but after that, we got into an argument and it got really emotional to where we both were about to cry. (well she did cry) I don't know if I simply love this girl more than any past fling but I NEVER cry. Just like all women she doesn't want to take responsibility, she just wants to move forward and do better. I feel there is an injustice and a direct attack on my ego/pride. In my head, the thing that would make all this salvageable is if she kicked the dude out, cried outside my house, begged me to come back, etc.

Test.
So I feel like I need to get my test checked or something, I'm only 25, I work out constantly, play basketball frequently, don't fap, don't watch porn nor social media, my diet is trash. I FEEL WEAK, I feel sensitive, I have a very hard time sleeping(I sleep with a bunch of regret and bad thoughts), I have a very hard time recovering after workouts, (granted I just started protein shakes) I'm afraid, I've been crying a lot, I hit a serious plateau in the gym, I have man boobs (but the amount of muscle I have is significant also) AND when it comes to her I just want her....I just feel going after other girls is a waste of energy, to try to start again is futile, I want other women to want me but I only want her.

So I feel like all these are a sign of low testosterone.
 

tomzestatlu

Kingfisher
Donfitz007 said:
Thanks again guys for all the help. I think I need to get my Test levels checked.

BAckground (skippable)
I saw the girl today cause I thought if I ___ her one last time it'll help. It helped in the physical sense but after that, we got into an argument and it got really emotional to where we both were about to cry. (well she did cry) I don't know if I simply love this girl more than any past fling but I NEVER cry. Just like all women she doesn't want to take responsibility, she just wants to move forward and do better. I feel there is an injustice and a direct attack on my ego/pride. In my head, the thing that would make all this salvageable is if she kicked the dude out, cried outside my house, begged me to come back, etc.

Test.
So I feel like I need to get my test checked or something, I'm only 25, I work out constantly, play basketball frequently, don't fap, don't watch porn nor social media, my diet is trash. I FEEL WEAK, I feel sensitive, I have a very hard time sleeping(I sleep with a bunch of regret and bad thoughts), I have a very hard time recovering after workouts, (granted I just started protein shakes) I'm afraid, I've been crying a lot, I hit a serious plateau in the gym, I have man boobs (but the amount of muscle I have is significant also) AND when it comes to her I just want her....I just feel going after other girls is a waste of energy, to try to start again is futile, I want other women to want me but I only want her.

So I feel like all these are a sign of low testosterone.
All these are a sign of you are after break up. That´s it. Everybody who isn´t psychopath would feels this. Just try to rationalize those feelings, accept them, but don´t hamster. Analyze what you feel and what´s the reason you feel it.

If you are 25, all you need for good T levels is to keep your routine straight.

Focus on the man boobs and you will be better man.
 

Aizen

Kingfisher
Orthodox
It's first important to recognize whether you're stressed from the magnitude/intensity of your work, or you're simply feeling the symptoms of stress from some other cause.

As a general antitode to any mental/physical problem - which are more often than not related - I would recommend to make sure you're covering the three things that keep a body functional:

1) Quality sleep: 7-9 as a young adult, slightly less as one gets older.
2) Quality food: Low carb, little/no alcohol, naturally raised meat/eggs
3) Quality fitness: Good posture from stretching, good physique from working out

Cover these three bases and the majority of intangible issues will likely dissipate
 
Looks like the girl situation is a big part of the stress. Difficult one tbh, I am not sure why you got into an argument with her though. If she cheated on you it happened, either YOU can do something to make sure it doesnt happen again, and secure your pride and ego, or just let it/her go. Try and figure out why it happened and what YOU can do to prevent it happening again. Telling her it is not acceptable/bad/irresponsible will only cause more problems unless you have REAL LEVERAGE (you) to back it up.

Also, this age, 25 seems to be where men have the greatest amount of stress, because you only just entered adulthood, your ego is big but also fragile, and everything seems super serious, this is also the age where women are most sexually liberal and have the most men pursuing them, so it is a tough time for everyone. I went through a lot of crazy stuff at the age, and yeah, my stress levels were through the roof.
 

Cobra

Hummingbird
Gold Member
OP, being a hindu, knowing the spiritual benefit of practicing it properly and understanding how it applies to me, I highly recommend reading a quality translation of the Bhagvad Gita. The meditative concepts and ideas of the soul described therein have been around for much earlier than its western counterparts.
 
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