Struggling With Denominations

[Starlight]

Yeah, I know the feeling when it seems like everything comes down to "give us money" and then they get annoyed when people don't want to donate to stuff that doesn't matter in the long run.

We went to an Antiochian church the other night which was very convert heavy and it had a Protestant vibe that I can't really explain but I know it when I feel it. I can see why church shopping is intimidating.

It just bugs me when church leaders (not just Pastors/Priests but committees, boards, groups, etc., within a church) view the congregation as an open checkbook. After attending a few of my church’s budget/finance meetings recently, I’ve found out that my church has absolutely horrible finances. It’s like throwing money into a black hole… and makes it really hard to want to donate money when it is being so poorly managed.

The Antiochian church we’re looking at is pretty much a convert church. The Priest is a convert (though from decades ago). Probably 80% of the congregation are converts. I imagine it’s nice to not have the ethnocentrism to deal with which was challenging at my husband’s GO church where there was a definite in-group/out-group feeling.

 

[stugatz]

I dabbled in various Protestant denominations from childhood and beyond, settled into non-denominational ("new thought") a few years ago, eventually found that lacking, kept thinking throughout the pandemic about finding a Christian church. I didn't feel the Protestant ones were going to cut it for me, but I was daunted about going to an Orthodox church by myself for the first time. Then I started talking to an Orthodox man online recently, and after some discussion, decided to go for the first time this weekend. I'm American and will go to an Orthodox Church in America parish.

I've been searching far and wide for my whole life. I'm very new to this and have a lot to learn. But Orthodox Christianity is looking very promising so far.

The overtly foreign nature of Orthodoxy is what's kept me from bothering, even if I find a good denomination I feel like I'm intruding on something that isn't my culture. (I'm Italian and Eastern European - definitely some Byzantine Catholics in the latter part of my background, but Eastern Christianity makes up less than 5% of the United States.)

As much as I love Traditional Catholicism, though, part of me thinks that it's not long for this world in its current state where it pays constant lip service to respecting the English mass and the modern papacy. Trads will probably all go the way of SSPX and be in schism with the church. I expect some others to convert to Orthodoxy, and we'll maybe see the numbers grow for them. (Latin Rite Orthodoxy I've heard mentioned, maybe it'll become a more significant thing for disgruntled Catholics looking for a home?)

 

[TexasJenn]

The overtly foreign nature of Orthodoxy is what's kept me from bothering, even if I find a good denomination I feel like I'm intruding on something that isn't my culture.

I'm American (mostly Irish roots) and found an Orthodox Church of America. Before I felt like I wouldn't be able to find a parish where I fit in ethnically. My new parish is mostly people with similar roots to mine.

I'm no expert, but there seem to be many options for various ethnicities.

 

[Ah_Tibor]

It just bugs me when church leaders (not just Pastors/Priests but committees, boards, groups, etc., within a church) view the congregation as an open checkbook. After attending a few of my church’s budget/finance meetings recently, I’ve found out that my church has absolutely horrible finances. It’s like throwing money into a black hole… and makes it really hard to want to donate money when it is being so poorly managed.

My mom got annoyed recently at her church because they sent out an *urgent notice*, and then it turned out that the money wasn't needed for anything, it's just sitting in the bank for a rainy day.

I think those of us who work hourly get kind of annoyed by that sort of thing, haha

The Antiochian church we’re looking at is pretty much a convert church. The Priest is a convert (though from decades ago). Probably 80% of the congregation are converts. I imagine it’s nice to not have the ethnocentrism to deal with which was challenging at my husband’s GO church where there was a definite in-group/out-group feeling.

Yeah, they seemed like nice people and a good community, it still had an in/out-group feeling because of the large convert presence (the converts being the in-group in this case).

We go to our church because we know a lot of the people there, and there's a lot generational interconnectedness that I like (there's a 90+ guy who was friends with my husband's grandmother, one of our friend's dad was friends with my dad, a lot of the families have been friends for a long time, etc). It's generally a nice feeling, sort of like cousins that you don't see every day, because there's a sense we're not going away and are stuck with each other. I don't think we would be in the same place unless we had Orthodoxy as our lynchpin, though.

I dunno. Six in one/half dozen I guess, haha. I think you have to go where you're comfortable.

 

[IconWriter]

Perhaps if we were to actually tithe, the full 10%, our conscience would not be bothered and we wouldn't be annoyed when asked for increased donations. Just a thought.

 

[TexasJenn]

Perhaps if we were to actually tithe, the full 10%, our conscience would not be bothered and we wouldn't be annoyed when asked for increased donations. Just a thought.

I've been working Dave Ramsey's financial plan for a few years, and I just made my first tithe to my new church.

My MAIN motivator for getting very smart with my money was empowering myself to become OUTRAGEOUSLY GENEROUS, as Dave Ramsey frequently preaches. I've wanted to tithe for a long time, have done charitable contributions, but only now found a church I feel I can truly believe in. I feel great about making my first tithe this week, because I think the best possible channel for charitable giving is good churches.

The final step in his baby steps plan is to build wealth and give - and he advocates tithing and being generous every step of the way. But once you build meaningful wealth, that's when you can get OUTRAGEOUSLY generous and start to solve some real problems for people in need. That's my ultimate goal with money.

According to Dave, only 10-25% of churchgoers tithe - meaning 75-90% do not. Here's a great article from his blog about tithes and offerings.

 

[Starlight]

Perhaps if we were to actually tithe, the full 10%, our conscience would not be bothered and we wouldn't be annoyed when asked for increased donations. Just a thought.

I agree. Except I would add that the church receiving the tithes also has a responsibility to use the money wisely.

 

[IconWriter]

True, the church must be financially responsible, but also are we supposed to give to the beggar on the corner, regardless of how we think he might be spending it? Sorry, I don't want to get off the OP.

 

[Elspeth]

Being a scientist heavily influences how I learn and study things. I try to do things in a way that will limit as much of my human bias as possible. Therefore, my advice is this: read the Scriptures, and interpret them according to the authors' intentions (I recommend keeping a collection of various handbooks -- that way, if one leans more to one denomination, you have another that may bring you back towards the middle by offering a different perspective). Once you do this, then decide which denomination (if any) aligns better with what you're reading. Whether it's politics, religion, or parenting, never do it vice versa. In other words, do not study various denominations or schools of thought first. Ideally, one should chose one based on doctrine, and not collective expression of their faith (a.k.a worship or meeting styles), but ultimately, that will be a factor too. To sum it all up...

1. Study the Scriptures first, then decide which denomination aligns more with what you're learning, not the other way around.
2. Choose a denomination based first on doctrine, second on expression of faith.

Also, it's okay if you find yourself caught between two different denominations. For instance, I'm a non-denominational, Protestant Christian, through-and-through, but I also adore the worship style of the Orthodoxy Church. Therefore, I enjoy attending both church services. Hope this helps!

 

[DanielH]

1. Study the Scriptures first, then decide which denomination aligns more with what you're learning, not the other way around.
2. Choose a denomination based first on doctrine, second on expression of faith.

The protestant reformers removed books from canon such as 2 Maccabees which includes prayer for the dead, despite New Testament authors often citing it and other books that the reformers removed from canon.

Also, it's okay if you find yourself caught between two different denominations. For instance, I'm a non-denominational, Protestant Christian, through-and-through, but I also adore the worship style of the Orthodoxy Church. Therefore, I enjoy attending both church services. Hope this helps!

Unfortunately, it is not okay. Lukewarm is worse than cold, which we learn in Revelation 3. The Church is the undivided body of Christ. There are not multiple valid Churches, speaking as an institution.

 

[TexasJenn]

True, the church must be financially responsible, but also are we supposed to give to the beggar on the corner, regardless of how we think he might be spending it? Sorry, I don't want to get off the OP.

I've thought about starting a Christian finances thread here in the Ladies' forum. I haven't yet because I've been very busy with work and preparing to meet my Orthodox Christian gentleman friend this weekend. We're having the most fabulous conversations about the topic - it's something we've both been working toward and thinking about a lot.

My feeling is that so many people are just not organized and disciplined with their finances, including Christians, and there's so much potential to do more good, help uplift the downtrodden and forgotten, and spread the good word if people are motivated to get organized and get disciplined about giving tithes and offerings. We are called to do so. I've gotten pretty good at this and feel the beginnings of a calling to help others do the same, for the greater good.

If someone starts such a thread, I'll definitely participate

 

[Starlight]

My mom got annoyed recently at her church because they sent out an *urgent notice*, and then it turned out that the money wasn't needed for anything, it's just sitting in the bank for a rainy day.

I think those of us who work hourly get kind of annoyed by that sort of thing, haha




Yeah, they seemed like nice people and a good community, it still had an in/out-group feeling because of the large convert presence (the converts being the in-group in this case).

We go to our church because we know a lot of the people there, and there's a lot generational interconnectedness that I like (there's a 90+ guy who was friends with my husband's grandmother, one of our friend's dad was friends with my dad, a lot of the families have been friends for a long time, etc). It's generally a nice feeling, sort of like cousins that you don't see every day, because there's a sense we're not going away and are stuck with each other. I don't think we would be in the same place unless we had Orthodoxy as our lynchpin, though.

I dunno. Six in one/half dozen I guess, haha. I think you have to go where you're comfortable.

I guess most any church (or community in general) will have a bit of an in-group/out-group. It’s just human nature. And I think that’s what has been the most difficult part about leaving my current church. I’m part of the in-group there since I’ve attended for a couple decades along with my parents and brothers (besides the brief time I attended my husband’s GO church). Being in a community that long has a very cozy feeling that’s hard to leave behind and essentially start over.

 

[Ah_Tibor]

I guess most any church (or community in general) will have a bit of an in-group/out-group. It’s just human nature. And I think that’s what has been the most difficult part about leaving my current church. I’m part of the in-group there since I’ve attended for a couple decades along with my parents and brothers (besides the brief time I attended my husband’s GO church). Being in a community that long has a very cozy feeling that’s hard to leave behind and essentially start over.

Yeah, I think you just get used to people, wherever it is.

One thing I like being near a city is that people somehow are more likely to talk to their neighbors. My husband grew up in suburban area (I was in some hybrid of rural/suburban) and he was mentioned people tended to be more standoffish in general because you have to drive everywhere, and neighbors aren't really close together or have a reason to talk to each other.

 

[Elspeth]

The protestant reformers removed books from canon such as 2 Maccabees which includes prayer for the dead, despite New Testament authors often citing it and other books that the reformers removed from canon.

Unfortunately, it is not okay. Lukewarm is worse than cold, which we learn in Revelation 3. The Church is the undivided body of Christ. There are not multiple valid Churches, speaking as an institution.

I'm not sure how the first paragraph relates to my previous post, but regarding the second, just because a Christian doesn't belong to the same kind of sect that you do, does not mean they are lukewarm. I understand that the Orthodox Church does not believe in the validity of other sects, but geez, save it for a thread that's actually about that topic. The OP was about seeking help for her uncertainty about choosing a denomination, not about the actual denomination itself.

 

[Kadikoy]

I feel torn and kind of, well, homeless.

Quick background: Was raised Catholic. (Mom was, too; Dad was Dutch Reformed). During childhood I had no love for Mass; I found it boring and only liked the donuts, lol.
Felt a draw toward the spiritual, always; this kind of culminated in late adolescence when I realized I was looking for worship that was more passionate. I ended up at a Pentecostal church for over a decade. While I never spoke in tongues or believed in it, I did deeply love a worship style that was super emotional (or "on fire" as Pentecostals say).
Lost faith completely for a time in my mid-30s after several years of deep doubt and unanswered questions.
Realized quite quickly (six months or so) that atheism held no less doubts than faith did. Had zero desire to return to my Pentecostal church, though (my loss of faith had been very public; also, I was changing as a person, to realize that I found the emotional worship style empty). I decided to return to Mass. I absolutely loved it. It wasn't easy, as I went alone (husband is deeply Protestant), but I went. The parish I was attending was very conservative. Not Latin; but very old-school.
Moved 300 miles away. This brought me to a strongly Protestant small town environment. There is one Catholic church, but it is modern. I could drive 30-40 minutes and find other parishes, but it is challenging, esp. in the winter, as I have strong phobias of snow driving). I began attending a Protestant church w/my family; we went for two years or so and enjoyed it.
Then... covid. The little church we'd been attending is basically gone. Still physically there, but went through such a transition that it's not the same. We have not found a new one.
I still feel very much drawn to Mass but have only gone once, I think, since covid. I have zero desire whatsoever to wear masks at Mass and I am deeply, deeply concerned at the typical Catholic stance on the vaccine. The only churches who seem to be pro-freedom are the little independent Protestant ones. But when I pray, I pray like a Catholic. And I adore the quiet, holy reverence of Mass. At 42 years old, that is what I seek. As an introvert, I cringe at the evangelical tendency to "pounce" on the newbie and draw them into the social whirl.
I guess I just wish I could have the best of both worlds: the beauty of Mass with the conservative Protestant redpilling on covid. Also, I don't relish the idea of saying that I am Catholic in this super-duper Protestant environment. Maybe that's shallow, idk. I also realize I'm rambling. I'll stop now.

Check out JourneyToOrthodoxy.com Many good stories there. You are not alone in your search for Truth.

 

[DanielH]

I'm not sure how the first paragraph relates to my previous post

You said to study the scriptures to determine which denomination to choose, I was merely pointing out that different Christian denominations have different scriptures, and there may be less than ideal reasons for some books to have been removed after they were considered canonical for over a thousand years.

just because a Christian doesn't belong to the same kind of sect that you do, does not mean they are lukewarm.

I'll preface this by saying I don't know you personally; I don't know if you simply went to an Orthodox Church for a wedding or a baptismal service, both of which are very beautiful, so I cannot judge your temperature, admittedly, nor should I try, but it appears you've got one foot in one faith and another foot in another as you say you [present tense] enjoy the "non-denominational" and the Orthodox services alike. There's hot and cold Christians of all different "sects" as you call it (I certainly wouldn't call Steven Anderson "lukewarm" for example), but in general, long-term attending the religious services of two completely different religions because one feels nice and the other academically seems correct is not something I would describe as "hot" or "cold."

I understand that the Orthodox Church does not believe in the validity of other sects, but geez, save it for a thread that's actually about that topic.

*Checks thread title - "Struggling with denominations"

Uhh, I did. This is also an explicitly Orthodox forum and a thread topic which is explicitly about religion.

The OP was about seeking help for her uncertainty about choosing a denomination, not about the actual denomination itself.

I was responding to you and your claims, not the OP, although I hope my response had value to @Luna Novem or someone else.

 

[Elspeth]

You said to study the scriptures to determine which denomination to choose, I was merely pointing out that different Christian denominations have different scriptures, and there may be less than ideal reasons for some books to have been removed after they were considered canonical for over a thousand years.

I'll preface this by saying I don't know you personally; I don't know if you simply went to an Orthodox Church for a wedding or a baptismal service, both of which are very beautiful, so I cannot judge your temperature, admittedly, nor should I try, but it appears you've got one foot in one faith and another foot in another as you say you [present tense] enjoy the "non-denominational" and the Orthodox services alike. There's hot and cold Christians of all different "sects" as you call it (I certainly wouldn't call Steven Anderson "lukewarm" for example), but in general, long-term attending the religious services of two completely different religions because one feels nice and the other academically seems correct is not something I would describe as "hot" or "cold."


*Checks thread title - "Struggling with denominations"

Uhh, I did. This is also an explicitly Orthodox forum and a thread topic which is explicitly about religion.

I was responding to you and your claims, not the OP, although I hope my response had value to @Luna Novem or someone else.

That's fair to add that different sects have different Scriptures, I just wasn't certain how it was related to my comment. When it comes to the term "lukewarm", it appears you have a different definition for it than I do. Lukewarm, as I understand it, means not being whole-hearted about one's faith in Christ (for example, making Christ one's "savior" but not one's "lord"). Because the Church is an integral part of one's faith in Orthodoxy, I can see how it would be "lukewarm". However, because the Church is important, but not a part of one's faith in Protestantism, that's not what this word means. Unfortunately I can't speak of Catholicism because I don't know enough about it.

Lastly, I know this is an Orthodox forum (now), but that doesn't mean other kinds of Christians are not here (for now). I'd expect that everyone knows there's going to be a difference in opinions, but the central message of my post should still stand regardless of what one's personal denomination is. Unity in Christ means being able to see past those differences and be able to gather with the common denominator of our faith in Christ.

 

[The Beast1]

The overtly foreign nature of Orthodoxy is what's kept me from bothering, even if I find a good denomination I feel like I'm intruding on something that isn't my culture. (I'm Italian and Eastern European - definitely some Byzantine Catholics in the latter part of my background, but Eastern Christianity makes up less than 5% of the United States.)

I feel the same way. I could probably weasel into a Greek Orthodox church since my wife was born in Cyprus but that's a stretch. I'm Lutheran, love the culture behind it, and the classical music history behind its high church. I struggle to find good LCMS and Wels churches that haven't gone to praise music.

I discovered this, https://lutheranorthodoxchurch.org/

It's an off shot of Lutheranism that seeks to maintain the cultural traditions of Lutheranism but while integrating the traditional elements of Orthodoxy thusly making communion possible. I need to do more research and my short conversation with their leadership was positive. They have an orthodox priest as a consultant on their volunteer board. Nice, but I'm hesitant since their churches are very small and scattered

I'm just frustrated with my pastor for maintaining obnoxious mask protocols and goofy protocols at communion while the church across my street from my house is for all intents and purposes back to normal.

 

[ChristFollower1111]

I’ve been staying away from this thread because I knew I was most likely going to end up writing a very long post that few will read, but if someone does read and has advice or insight that I didn’t think of before, then awesome.

I was raised primarily Protestant in a Reform church (ethnic and traditional) and also in a non-denominational church for youth services, etc. We attended 2 main churches throughout my childhood and also, my grandmother was catholic and I would occasionally attend mass with her, and also did a year of Catholic schooling in elementary. I grew up familiar with Catholic services and prayers, but never had a first communion.

I became disillusioned with “the church” as a teenager when the youth pastor was having an affair with a girl in our youth group. Not relevant, but it turned me off church for awhile altogether. I started going to mass as a teenager with my boyfriend (now husband) who has always been a devout Catholic. I considered doing RCIA in my late teens/early 20s to convert and officially be able to receive the Eucharist, but for some reason I never really felt convicted to do it. After a lot of thought and prayer over the years, I have realized that one reason I never wanted to officially convert to Catholicism is that I feel it would be “buying into” the hierarchy of the church, the Vatican and papacy- things I just can’t get behind. This current pope is heretical, as people have pointed out, and I can’t separate that from the institution of Catholicism. I know there are many faithful Catholics, such as my husband, who agree with me on these issues. If I was a “cradle Catholic” with baptism and communion in the Catholic Church, I would remain as such. But since I’m not, I do not want to convert. My husband used to be bothered by this, but is not anymore.

I’m not sure I really consider myself Protestant either anymore. There are so many different types of Protestant churches, some of which I agree with more than others. My belief is that anyone who accepts Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior is saved and is a follower of Christ. That- I certainly am. Now- I’m curious about orthodoxy after reading on this forum for awhile. I attended Greek Orthodox services several years ago and the ethnic / Greek language component was a turn off, but I’m ready to try again. What I like about orthodoxy is that it has tradition and history behind it, but also doesn’t follow the corrupt Vatican hierarchy like the Catholic church does (I hope I’m not offending any Catholics here who agree with that system- I know some do and some don’t. As an aside- it seems to be less-devout cradle Catholics who believe the most in the Vatican and papacy. Most truly faithful believers see the problems with it. In my personal observation only). One thing about orthodoxy that I’m not sure about is that I get the impression from some orthodox Christians on this forum that they feel that others are not “true” Christians or perhaps their salvation is in jeopardy unless they become orthodox. Maybe it’s not what they really believe, but thats the impression that I sometimes get. Im not here to argue with anyone or defend my salvation or status as a Christian, since I owe that only to God. But it does factor into my decision- if I don’t feel that converting to orthodox is necessary for my very salvation, then should I? I believe I am already saved for my faith in Christ and the fruit He has produced in my life. I would convert to orthodoxy if I felt compelled by Christ to do so, because He gave me the conviction that it is the best place for me to be for my spiritual growth, etc. Obviously, I will follow where God leads and since I am open to orthodoxy, He may be leading me there, but I maintain that I am already saved and His follower. I do see the spiritual benefits of being able to participate in sacraments and that is something I may like to do. Many Protestant churches I’ve been to don’t even do communion anymore. But again- as much as those practices are beneficial, I do not believe it is explicitly necessary in order to have salvation and eternal life with Christ.
How very Protestant of me.

So- yes, I’m a bit lost right now too in terms of finding an earthly church “home”. I’m praying and searching for where God will lead my family and I. I’m also praying that my husband and I can find a faith that we both fully agree upon. Then again, in many ways I feel we have found that- we both read our bibles, follow Jesus Christ, and have the same moral convictions/values. We aren’t really at odds in any meaningful way.

As far as doctrines go, such as solo scriptura, I have more of a Catholic/Orthodox view on that subject. But- I have never understood why people argue about different doctrines like that, since so much of it is based on personal experience, preference, and what God has chosen to reveal to a given person. I also have no issue with Catholic scriptures and don’t see why they are left out of the Protestant Bible. But- there are other important books that have been left out of the biblical canon, such as Enoch, Jasher and Jubilees, which I highly recommend by the way. I wouldn’t doubt that the biblical canon was messed with and used for political purposes, which would not be surprising.

 

[Elspeth]

I’ve been staying away from this thread because I knew I was most likely going to end up writing a very long post that few will read, but if someone does read and has advice or insight that I didn’t think of before, then awesome.

I was raised primarily Protestant in a Reform church (ethnic and traditional) and also in a non-denominational church for youth services, etc. We attended 2 main churches throughout my childhood and also, my grandmother was catholic and I would occasionally attend mass with her, and also did a year of Catholic schooling in elementary. I grew up familiar with Catholic services and prayers, but never had a first communion.

I became disillusioned with “the church” as a teenager when the youth pastor was having an affair with a girl in our youth group. Not relevant, but it turned me off church for awhile altogether. I started going to mass as a teenager with my boyfriend (now husband) who has always been a devout Catholic. I considered doing RCIA in my late teens/early 20s to convert and officially be able to receive the Eucharist, but for some reason I never really felt convicted to do it. After a lot of thought and prayer over the years, I have realized that one reason I never wanted to officially convert to Catholicism is that I feel it would be “buying into” the hierarchy of the church, the Vatican and papacy- things I just can’t get behind. This current pope is heretical, as people have pointed out, and I can’t separate that from the institution of Catholicism. I know there are many faithful Catholics, such as my husband, who agree with me on these issues. If I was a “cradle Catholic” with baptism and communion in the Catholic Church, I would remain as such. But since I’m not, I do not want to convert. My husband used to be bothered by this, but is not anymore.

I’m not sure I really consider myself Protestant either anymore. There are so many different types of Protestant churches, some of which I agree with more than others. My belief is that anyone who accepts Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior is saved and is a follower of Christ. That- I certainly am. Now- I’m curious about orthodoxy after reading on this forum for awhile. I attended Greek Orthodox services several years ago and the ethnic / Greek language component was a turn off, but I’m ready to try again. What I like about orthodoxy is that it has tradition and history behind it, but also doesn’t follow the corrupt Vatican hierarchy like the Catholic church does (I hope I’m not offending any Catholics here who agree with that system- I know some do and some don’t. As an aside- it seems to be less-devout cradle Catholics who believe the most in the Vatican and papacy. Most truly faithful believers see the problems with it. In my personal observation only). One thing about orthodoxy that I’m not sure about is that I get the impression from some orthodox Christians on this forum that they feel that others are not “true” Christians or perhaps their salvation is in jeopardy unless they become orthodox. Maybe it’s not what they really believe, but thats the impression that I sometimes get. Im not here to argue with anyone or defend my salvation or status as a Christian, since I owe that only to God. But it does factor into my decision- if I don’t feel that converting to orthodox is necessary for my very salvation, then should I? I believe I am already saved for my faith in Christ and the fruit He has produced in my life. I would convert to orthodoxy if I felt compelled by Christ to do so, because He gave me the conviction that it is the best place for me to be for my spiritual growth, etc. Obviously, I will follow where God leads and since I am open to orthodoxy, He may be leading me there, but I maintain that I am already saved and His follower. I do see the spiritual benefits of being able to participate in sacraments and that is something I may like to do. Many Protestant churches I’ve been to don’t even do communion anymore. But again- as much as those practices are beneficial, I do not believe it is explicitly necessary in order to have salvation and eternal life with Christ.
How very Protestant of me.

So- yes, I’m a bit lost right now too in terms of finding an earthly church “home”. I’m praying and searching for where God will lead my family and I. I’m also praying that my husband and I can find a faith that we both fully agree upon. Then again, in many ways I feel we have found that- we both read our bibles, follow Jesus Christ, and have the same moral convictions/values. We aren’t really at odds in any meaningful way.

As far as doctrines go, such as solo scriptura, I have more of a Catholic/Orthodox view on that subject. But- I have never understood why people argue about different doctrines like that, since so much of it is based on personal experience, preference, and what God has chosen to reveal to a given person. I also have no issue with Catholic scriptures and don’t see why they are left out of the Protestant Bible. But- there are other important books that have been left out of the biblical canon, such as Enoch, Jasher and Jubilees, which I highly recommend by the way. I wouldn’t doubt that the biblical canon was messed with and used for political purposes, which would not be surprising.

Thank you for sharing. I couldn't agree more on all those points! I believe God is faithful and He will lead you where you need to go. Because you have an open mind and are motivated purely by wanting to seek the Lord, rather than familiarity or identity, I know wherever you end up, it'll be the right place. Just keep praying about it with your husband (bless his soul for being so supportive), keep attending these churches, keep studying the Scriptures (all of them), and keep communing with Christians of all denominations, and I know you'll arrive at where you need to be very soon.