The Miley Cyrus trainwreck

neanderthal said:
It's funny how she is supposedly a train wreck but the media can't get her out their mouths.

She is going to make millions off these stunts.

Yeah this really seems more like a very calculated ploy to push Lady Gaga out of the way. Having flyover state housefraus cluck their tongues at this shit is marketing gold, since those dims are the only ones paying attention to celebrity crap in the first place. Her music is the same as any other pop crap, her looks don't stand out over any other pop star, she's too old for the 12 year old girl disney fanbase now, really the only rational decision is to do crazy shit to generate attention and sell mediocre albums.
 

Virtus

Pelican
Gold Member
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/pop_star

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AnonymousBosch

Crow
Gold Member
As predicted, Hemsworth realised he was High Value this morning, and dumped her arse. The News Reports are stating It's Official, because she unfollowed him on Twitter.

Expect a feminist backlash about men fearing Strong Independent Women; The Slut / Stud double standard; Cultural Appropriation Triggering his Innate Racism etc.

I suspect his next girlfriend will be long-haired and feminine.
 

Akula

Ostrich
Gold Member
Que enspastic said:
YUCK SHE IS FILTH

yeah, but I'd still bang 'er. Even despite all the skankiness, tats & the weird haircut. The Hannah Montanna flag would be epic.

Glad Hemsworth dumped her. I'm sure this was a calculated 'youthful indiscretion' on Cyrus' part and in ten years People Magazine will be writing stories on how she's 'grown-up', found her way in life etc. (despite being on her 3rd or 4th husband!!, etc.
 

kosko

Peacock
Gold Member
Her body is boring. She is fit and tight, but she is a yonge women that should be expcted, its sad that you need a Hollywood celebrity to show what a normal 20 year old women should look like in America as far as a body goes for the most part.

But damn she need some ass, its lacking baaaaaaad.

I'm just trying to figure out how this train wreak all ends. Like what is she going to do to steam out? Rehab is like 2008 style, pornos are old school too. How is she is going to reach her ratchet peak?
 

Gmac

Peacock
Gold Member
All in the plan. Apparently she has a new record coming out in 1-2 weeks. You think this is for attention? You're half right, it's for the $$$. Sell-out? Yeah. Brilliant? Whoever is pulling the strings sure is. Once she's old and dried up they'll move on to the next young star. You know how they've succeeded? They even got guys like you talking about her.
 

AnonymousBosch

Crow
Gold Member
kosko said:
Her body is boring. She is fit and tight, but she is a yonge women that should be expcted, its sad that you need a Hollywood celebrity to show what a normal 20 year old women should look like in America as far as a body goes for the most part.

But damn she need some ass, its lacking baaaaaaad.

I'm just trying to figure out how this train wreak all ends. Like what is she going to do to steam out? Rehab is like 2008 style, pornos are old school too. How is she is going to reach her ratchet peak?

I never believed I could see a fit, nearly-naked 20 year old girl and have her fail the boner test, but... yeah.

If there's no shame left in society, where can she go? Maybe a video where her flaps lip-synch via CGI?
 

Lights

Woodpecker
She's an entertainer. What's the problem. Western civilization is decadent, she capitalized on America's feelings that we should be less trashy because things are fucked up enough already. Execution is perfect. We talk about her but don't quite hate her or write her off, but sympathize with her being a reflection of America's youth today.
 

The Lizard of Oz

Crow
Gold Member
The resident NY Times queer-or-mangina (that's getting to be an increasingly tough guessing game by the way) "pop music critic" wrote a review of this creature's new album which is a barely comprehensible exercise in the tortuous party line that is apparently deemed necessary these days when it comes to the single most important topic in the world, which is what we are supposed to make of some tatted up skank.

Seriously, there is a fanatical mincing carefulness to the article which is what some North Korean internal reports of party congresses must read like.

The article is entitled "Get Back, and Just Let Miley Cyrus Grow Up". Alright.

It opens up with this salvo:

Enough already. Enough with the nose-in-the-air repudiations and the false moral panics. Enough of the finger pointing and the slut shaming. Enough with the using of Miley Cyrus as a punching bag.

Then the queer-mangina hamster (we need a new gif for that because it's a very different animal from either the female or the male hamster... Tuth?) really gets going:

It’s numbingly easy to pick on someone like Ms. Cyrus for her creative choices, and the vitriol aimed at her in recent weeks has felt especially hollow, declarations of cultural war from defenders of an innocent past that never was. That goes for pop as a whole, which always needs flamboyant disruptors to survive, and for Ms. Cyrus herself, who’s been famous for half her young life and is astute about fame’s demands.

LOL!! Sweet f'ing diction there Jon.

“Bangerz” (RCA), which will be released on Tuesday, is Ms. Cyrus’s fourth solo album, though that’s not the most useful metric given the rate with which she’s molted skin in recent years.

Alright, so how did Ms Cyrus do?

The results are scattershot, but sometimes great, reflecting an artist still making sense of new inputs. She worked largely with the producer Mike WiLL Made-It, a heavy in hip-hop and R&B but not, until now, a true pop force. Even his success here is on unusual terms — the songs he’s created for Ms. Cyrus rumble like obstinate weather systems. Their hit “We Can’t Stop” is an ornery, stubborn song, sticking low to the ground, never letting Ms. Cyrus soar vocally. But the video, with Ms. Cyrus in louche party-comedown mode, was a YouTube star burst. Suddenly, the exhaustion in the song was clear; it was because Ms. Cyrus was tuckered out.

lol wut?

Seriously, this is some of the most tortured and bizarre writing I've ever seen. This super-mangina (or gay?) is jumping through some truly spectacular hoops to somehow achieve just the right take on this whore as approved in the latest Feminist Congress.

The thrill of Ms. Cyrus is that it’s virtually impossible to know what her insides look like. Her shift to high fashion and hip-hop was sudden, and more effective than one could have expected.

Dang.

Twelve months ago, there would have been no way to predict that she’d show up on a song like “23” (from Mike WiLL Made-It’s forthcoming album) as a drawl-heavy rapper — rapping better than her song mate Wiz Khalifa, it should be said — and then appear in the video wearing a Michael Jordan jersey sliced and diced into some sort of bustier-diaper combo. It’s daring and odd and disarmingly effective; if she can do this, what other worldviews can she inhabit?

I don't know. What other worldviews do you think this bitch can inhabit, Jon?

It goes on in the same vein. Read for yourself. By the way, it's obvious that this guy has as much of a feel for music as I do for Egyptian hieroglyphics. It's a scarily empty, formal text exercise without any content whatsoever but adhering to the form that was somehow laid down in this nonsense world.

Between putting dogs in an MRI scanner and crafting these bizarre mandarin appraisals of the sacred whore Miley, it's quite a world out there at the Old Grey Lady.
 

scorpion

Hummingbird
Gold Member
I find it utterly bizarre how we're supposed to take modern pop music seriously and as meriting careful critical review. Does anyone actually believe that there is some kind of deeper, intellectual message buried within modern pop and rap music? It's one of the most absurd things I've ever seen. This reviewer, and anyone else who pretends to take pop music seriously (because that's what they're doing, pretending) is a complete fraud and a sell-out. This music is absolute garbage and is produced for reasons of moneymaking only, and this is a fact that is crystal clear to anyone with a functioning brain and working ears. The fact that Miley Cyrus's garbage pop album apparently merits critical review in the paper of record is a sad commentary on how degraded our culture has become. What's next, will the NY Times restaurant critic sat down to review a meal of Skittles and Hot Pockets?
 
Miley's actions are as shallow as her music is, honestly. I'm pretty sure she's the next Amanda Bynes, they're all so similar: young, rich, confused, and unguided. Tons of money and fame leads to drugs and the associated lifestyle, and that's where it seems to get ugly.
 

The Lizard of Oz

Crow
Gold Member
scorpion said:
I find it utterly bizarre how we're supposed to take modern pop music seriously and as meriting careful critical review. Does anyone actually believe that there is some kind of deeper, intellectual message buried within modern pop and rap music? It's one of the most absurd things I've ever seen. This reviewer, and anyone else who pretends to take pop music seriously (because that's what they're doing, pretending) is a complete fraud and a sell-out. This music is absolute garbage and is produced for reasons of moneymaking only, and this is a fact that is crystal clear to anyone with a functioning brain and working ears. The fact that Miley Cyrus's garbage pop album apparently merits critical review in the paper of record is a sad commentary on how degraded our culture has become. What's next, will the NY Times restaurant critic sat down to review a meal of Skittles and Hot Pockets?

Hold on there.

This fool is doing nothing but pretending, that's true. He has no interest in music whatsoever, he is engaged in an arcane formal exercise to satisfy some demented ideological requirements.

But generally? That's a different story.

There are creations of genius that go under the category of "pop music" that are worth taking with as much seriousness and passion as anything in the world.

Enjoy:

 
The Lizard of Oz said:
scorpion said:
I find it utterly bizarre how we're supposed to take modern pop music seriously and as meriting careful critical review. Does anyone actually believe that there is some kind of deeper, intellectual message buried within modern pop and rap music? It's one of the most absurd things I've ever seen. This reviewer, and anyone else who pretends to take pop music seriously (because that's what they're doing, pretending) is a complete fraud and a sell-out. This music is absolute garbage and is produced for reasons of moneymaking only, and this is a fact that is crystal clear to anyone with a functioning brain and working ears. The fact that Miley Cyrus's garbage pop album apparently merits critical review in the paper of record is a sad commentary on how degraded our culture has become. What's next, will the NY Times restaurant critic sat down to review a meal of Skittles and Hot Pockets?

Hold on there.

This fool is doing nothing but pretending, that's true. He has no interest in music whatsoever, he is engaged in an arcane formal exercise to satisfy some demented ideological requirements.

But generally? That's a different story.

There are creations of genius that go under the category of "pop music" that are worth taking with as much seriousness and passion as anything in the world.

Enjoy:


you want genius?.....I'll give you genius son

 
F1Driver said:
The Lizard of Oz said:
scorpion said:
I find it utterly bizarre how we're supposed to take modern pop music seriously and as meriting careful critical review. Does anyone actually believe that there is some kind of deeper, intellectual message buried within modern pop and rap music? It's one of the most absurd things I've ever seen. This reviewer, and anyone else who pretends to take pop music seriously (because that's what they're doing, pretending) is a complete fraud and a sell-out. This music is absolute garbage and is produced for reasons of moneymaking only, and this is a fact that is crystal clear to anyone with a functioning brain and working ears. The fact that Miley Cyrus's garbage pop album apparently merits critical review in the paper of record is a sad commentary on how degraded our culture has become. What's next, will the NY Times restaurant critic sat down to review a meal of Skittles and Hot Pockets?

Hold on there.

This fool is doing nothing but pretending, that's true. He has no interest in music whatsoever, he is engaged in an arcane formal exercise to satisfy some demented ideological requirements.

But generally? That's a different story.

There are creations of genius that go under the category of "pop music" that are worth taking with as much seriousness and passion as anything in the world.

Enjoy:


you want genius?.....I'll give you genius son



I win
 
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