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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Aleksandar" data-source="post: 1538851" data-attributes="member: 23812">I will share my experience, related to this subject, it's going to be a bit longer. I'd advise you to read it, since it might help you get a different perspective and quit a demonic activity.I'm in my late 20s, I was exposed to pornography at around 8 years of age, since there was already pornographic pictures, videos etc. on mobile phones at that time. As expected, masturbation was there as well and every single friend I know was deceived by it at that time.When I was younger (until I was about ~18) I'd watch pornography and masturbate multiple times per day, especially after we got high-speed internet. I started visiting 4chan as well at around 13-14, where I was exposed to horrific things, but to a lot of truth about politics, human nature etc., but also more pornography. Despite all that, I had normal social life, was training multiple sports, it wasn't the focus of my life, I wasted more time on video games.Since I was 18 years old, up until two years ago, I had a routine - pornography and masturbation before sleep, usually once (one ejaculation). As we all know, it starts with vanilla interests, but escalates into perversions. Fortunately for me, it never went too far (but it did happen) and I was never really addicted to pornography, despite doing it for 15+ years daily. I had multiple periods where I wouldn't watch porn at all, nor masturbate, just to prove to myself that I can. I always came back to it, since I didn't have enough interest to form relationships with women (caused in part by masturbation/pornography, but mostly by my personality and character) and rationalized that I need to stay healthy in that regard and "clean the pipes". I also trained very, very hard and had very high levels of testosterone (measured via blood tests), but had no girlfriend, so I used it as an outlet.I knew that the pornography industry is an atheist jewish industry and it's subversive goals, even when I was very young (14-15), but I didn't really care about that and considered myself immune to the deeper effects of it (which proved to be true, at least partially), I used it as a tool to finish a task so to say. But I also did it by imagination alone and sometimes even with a blank mind, pure physicality. I know it sounds funny, but I did it as a precaution so my sense of excitement doesn't rely on pornography alone and it worked.I'm writing all this, so you have a sense of the situation, so you can understand why my process of quitting was the way it was and why it may be different for you.Since I need to keep the story short, I started a serious spiritual practice after a couple mystical experiences (first one happened in late 2017.) about 2 and a half years ago. I am an Orthodox Christian, baptized way back in 2007., by my own request, but wasn't part of the Church because I was disappointed in the Clergy, because of them acting the way Pharisees did, with some exceptions.So when I started my spiritual practice, which I won't describe in detail, since I would be banned, I started getting the feeling that it's extremely harmful for my spiritual development to continue watching pornography and masturbating, so I stopped for a month - no pornography, no masturbation. It wasn't difficult at all, only the first couple of days I had some thoughts about it.When the period ended, I "rewarded" myself with pornography and masturbation, since I felt like I can stop whenever I want, so it wasn't harming me, nor it's an addiction. But I still had the same thoughts about it - this is harming my spiritual development and connection to God.While I'm writing this, it seems insane to me how could I ever think that watching other people have perverted sex trough a screen, while masturbating to it can be fine, especially since I'm a person that's highly intelligent and was red pilled while still in early elementary school. It's a demon-induced blindness and self-deception.It culminated on my birthday, I did the deed before bed, like I did many years, but I had a very strong vision:My Guardian Angel, deceased ancestors and relatives (especially my grandmother) all looking at me from Heaven on my birthday and crying profusely, because I'm lying in my bed, watching porn on my phone and masturbating, like a demon-possesed imbecile. It was a very strong experience, which removed my blindness and sobered me up instantly. I dropped on my knees and asked God to help me never do it again, to destroy the demons that are tempting me and swore on my life that I will do everything in my power never to do it again. I never masturbated or viewed pornography (willingly) since then and never will, with God's help. I had the urge to do it a couple months in, but resisted it and I never had it since.You just have to be vigilant and come to it with a sober mind. Especially when you're doing it, just ask yourself - what am I doing? I'm watching strangers (probably jewish men with Christian-born sexually abused women) which are on hard drugs and alcohol, having sex with 20 people around them and I'm a voyeur, who's masturbating to that scene. Is there anything more pathetic? Just imagine Lord Jesus Christ, who's there for you at all times, witnessing you violate yourself, going in the opposite direction of Grace.Even if you're doing it without porn, just imagine looking at yourself from above - is that something a person that has such a hard mission, following in the footsteps of Lord Jesus Christ, should be doing? It's self-destruction. Even non-spiritually, how can a grown man do such a thing? It's not normal, disregard the "everyone does it" talks of weaklings. We're on a mission.I'm telling you now, never do it again. When you get the urge, disassemble it analytically, if it's not obvious enough - you will gain nothing and lose everything by doing it. Rise above it, you're not an animal - which is an unfair comparison, since animal sexuality is as God intended it. Don't be a sub-animalistic creature, don't do it. I'll list some of the main things that helped me transform the sexual energy, into finer, spiritual energy:1. Prayer and breath control: For someone who's not knowledgeable enough, there's a simple (at first look), but effective practice, practiced at Mt. Athos. You perform the Jesus Prayer in a comfortable, seated position, with your back straight and head slightly tilted towards the floor, with eyes closed. While inhaling, you mentally say "Lord Jesus Christ", then you pause your breath and mentally say "Son of God" and while exhaling, you mentally say "have mercy on me, a sinner".  Keep your breathing natural, don't strain, this is very important. Do this for at least 10 minutes, try to be as relaxed as possible and focus on the meaning of the words, don't repeat it like a parrot, while thinking what you're gonna eat after you finish. This practice should be done early in the morning, before the first meal, after your morning prayer. You also do it before bed, before your evening prayer. First you need to dial in the technical aspects and develop your lungs and breathing musculature, later on, you can visualize the Holy Spirit, as white or yellow light that's entering you when you inhale, spread inside your entire body when you hold your breath and ejecting all the demonic gray-black smoke while exhaling. You will know when it's time to advance. But please don't strain and don't hold your breath too long, nor lower your head so your chin touches your chest, these are very advanced practices and can cause lung and heart problems.2. Stimuli avoidance: Stop looking at women online, don't look at provocative pictures, "instagram models" and avoid lustfully looking at women in public (difficult). You gain nothing by it, you only cause problems for yourself, it's an act of impotence. If you are looking at pictures of a female friend, pretty women in public or someone who you have realistic chance of meeting, then act upon it, talk with her, don't be a voyeur. I won't waste time on pornography - never watch it again, under any circumstances. If you don't have the willpower, honestly ask God to keep you away from it, by any means necessary - sickness, physical harm etc. This sounds extreme, but we're not on a picnic.3. Have proper perception and understanding of sexuality and love: A person does not need sexual pleasure, sexual pleasure with the absence of love is masturbating with a person, it's pornography reenactment. I make a difference between sex and making love, as corny as it sounds. Making love to a woman you love is a spiritual act, one that connects the lovers into one being that communes with God trough their love. Sex is a luciferian alternative, which has destructive emotions of domination, violence, perversion etc. There's more and more violence in sexual relations now, as the antichrist comes nearer, all the perversions come out and get intensified. You have to understand the spiritual investment and effects of these relations on a human being, but that's an incredibly complex topic, which is not meant for a forum like this. Sex being so heavily propagated, advertised, people being shamed for not doing it, or choosing to delay it until marriage - this is all proof that you're supposed to avoid it. For the married members, I'd advise to have relations once per week at most and in a dark room. Focus on the intimacy and love (if there is any) and it's going to be an incredible act. Most married couples simulate pornography daily and then they wonder why they are tired of each other after a couple of years. Orthodox Jews have marriage consultants, which advise the couples on matters of love, sexuality etc., in more detail than most Orthodox Christian Clergymen do, it's valuable to investigate it.There are many other practices, but they wouldn't be classified as Christian, so I won't include them. The point is, you have to implement conscious, disciplined effort in order to release yourself from the physical, emotional and mental cage that you made for yourself and it will take effort. Don't expect it to go away by itself, sexual energy will accumulate and if not transformed, it can and will eventually corrupt you. That's how some Priests or Monks, who were sincere Christians, end up as homosexuals, pedophiles or perverts. It happens in all religions. Do not underestimate this, you need to transform or release this energy properly - making love with your wife is the only choice for Christians, there are other, controversial methods as well, but you can explore that by yourself.I have to say that I do harbor hatred, despite knowing better, and sometimes wish death and ruination to the pornography producers and company owners and their families. I hope God's Holy Spirit pierces their heart and mind, so they can stop doing evil and ruin so many lives, but if not, may they burn in hell. Pornography should be banned and prison sentences for producing it and putting it into circulation should be draconic.When talking with your friends, colleagues or anyone, if the topic arises, please don't let them talk about pornography as something normal and relativize it, joke about it etc., speak up about how evil and demonic it is, in a tactical, diplomatic, factual manner, don't overreact.May God help us all with our struggles, we all have many demons to subdue and defeat, I hope my writing help someone defeat the demons of lust and perversion.Amen.</blockquote>

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