To Have And To HoldJanuary 20, 2021
Posted by K
In recent months, we have all been subjected to far more social media than we would normally experience and many of us have spent more time at home with our families than is the norm in this modern world.
For the past several years, I have noticed a rather worrying trend amongst women, which is to belittle their husbands and make him something of a laughingstock amongst friends. “Aren’t men daft?” or “Isn’t Daddy silly?” have become something of a refrain amongst certain women, most especially the middle-class types who trade stories of spousal humiliation with their friends over “a cheeky prosecco” - all for a cheap giggle.
I find this approach to relationships extremely distasteful and I think it has contributed a great deal to the breakdown in marriages which we now, so often, see. Feminism has encouraged women to think that they are better off without a man and, should they “settle” for one, they needn’t worry about his wellbeing in a relationship. Hypergamy has taught women that there is always someone better – that any man is lucky to have them – but the reality tells a very different tale.
The Lügenpresse (Lying Press) would have you believe that it is the woman who has all of the options when it comes to finding a partner: if she holds out long enough, every woman can find herself a Christian Gray, a multimillionaire sex-god, prepared to cater to her every whim. In honesty, the reality is very different – it is a man who chooses a wife and there is always, always another woman ready and waiting to take him off her hands. Whilst a woman can certainly choose to find a man for a “one-night stand” or a short-term relationship, it is – and always has been – the man who chooses a partner for life. In a world where divorce has become increasingly common, it is the man – not the woman – who is the buyer in the market.
When I was discussing my idea for this article with my husband, he suggested a very valid point: the popular press always puts forward the notion that women can select a man. This is true… in the short term. A woman can certainly go out and choose the man with whom she would like to spend the night – but it is untrue, and unfair, to suggest that this carries forward into a lifetime. Women have been ripped-off by feminism: they have been led to believe that bad behaviour and mistreatment of men will lead them into a lifetime of happiness. In reality, it will lead to nothing but arguments, unhappiness for their children and, ultimately, adultery.
When a man marries, he marries a wife. He marries a woman whom he hopes will be a good mother to his children and a good partner to him: he looks neither for a competitor nor a nag – he doesn’t expect his wife to put him down or berate him for every little thing he does or fails to do. This is not to say that I am advocating being a doormat or a skivvy – the opposite is true. A wife is an equal partner in a marriage… equal, but different. As I have said before, a woman should complement her husband’s masculinity with her femininity and be a yin to his yang. In practice, this means that disagreements should be conducted in private and that women shouldn’t seek to mock or humiliate their partners in public. Husbands deserve better than to have their private behaviour exposed to mockery and ridicule at every turn. Frankly, with the law being as skewed towards the female as it currently is, many common behaviours perpetrated by women to men would be seen as “abusive”, if the shoe were on the other foot.
I have heard and seen horror stories of women (now, unsurprisingly, divorced) who have belittled their husbands to their children; have been through his private correspondence; have shouted at him in front of neighbours and strangers; have sent videos mocking his playtime with his kids to his wider family; have been through his bank accounts and mobile phone records with a fine-tooth comb and have invited family members and children to join-in with the ridicule. These very same women have entirely let themselves go in terms of their appearance and who have woken their husbands up each morning with orders about the things which they should – and should not – do during the day.
This is not the way to treat a husband – it is not the way to be a good wife. Just imagine if I were to tell you that a woman was being treated in this manner by her husband – what would you say? Would you say that she was being abused? That he had no respect for her? That his behaviour was unacceptable? Well, you would be right… and this cuts both ways.
In order, then, for a woman to keep her husband, to retain his love and respect and to keep her family together, she needs to remember only one rule: “Do as you would be done by”. Everything which you expect and deserve from your husband, he should expect and deserve from you. Children, equally, should expect and deserve to be brought-up in a household in which mutual love and respect are the norm – otherwise, how on earth can they replicate it in their own relationships?
As nationalists, it is our duty to look at the reality of family life and to understand that the media has been pushing a false narrative and false expectations upon our people – and that it has been doing it for a reason. Thwart them: keep your family together. Have a home which is worthy of the children you have borne and a husband who loves you.