What's the oldest age a woman can be for you to seriously consider pursuing a relationship?

Some very good responses in this thread. I'm saving a couple responses. I think younger men worry way too much about where all the good women are when there's plenty of them. And even if being age appropriate is a factor here in America don't get attached to this country. I've seen older men in SEA with young Thai girlfriends. Getting old does suck but you can control the aging process to a degree.

If I'm not mistaken one of my former coworkers comes from a blue collar family where his mom stayed home and raised his 3 other siblings. Learn to make friends with people who's lives or families you're trying to emulate.
 

monsquid

Kingfisher
I would encourage all men to have a long term strategy. Men can go the distance. Men can go even further with guidance from God.

First step is to respect your mind, body, and soul in accordance with God's wishes. Understand that your physical being was made in the image of God. As such respect your health. Eat modestly and well. This means high quality whole foods in right proportions. Avoid processed and pre-made foods as much as possible. Let go of alcohol and other stimulants; totally abstain if possible. Exercise and most importantly sleep regular hours and plenty of it.

Respect your mind by reading the Bible and continuing to learn. Keep your mind challenged and engaged.

Finally, nourish your soul by attending Church, holding communion with fellow believers, and holding a prayer routine.

If you do all these things you will live a longer, healthier, and more prosperous life. A winning strategy like this will grant you more opportunities to find the right woman for family, make the right friends for life, and most importantly live a wholesome life.
 

Blade Runner

Pelican
Orthodox
It’s normal in Eastern Europe (where relationships are financially transactional and people poorer) for women to marry men twice their age.

In Western society it’s usually a red flag. Why would an attractive normal American girl marry a guy twice her age?
For the same reason(s) any other woman in the world would. The real issue is, marriage and being a wife isn't a priority for the western woman, on average.
 
I'm 37. After things didn't work out with my ex fiancee (36), I prayed to God to help me remain happily single or grant me a younger, Christian virgin, let's say early to late 20s. So my standards are pretty high now as I've literally placed it in God's hands. BTW, we can find a number of these women in good churches but pretty much nowhere else.
 

Tytalus

Pelican
I'm 37. After things didn't work out with my ex fiancee (36), I prayed to God to help me remain happily single or grant me a younger, Christian virgin, let's say early to late 20s. So my standards are pretty high now as I've literally placed it in God's hands. BTW, we can find a number of these women in good churches but pretty much nowhere else.
Keep going to Christian conferences, get involved in the wider Christian community. Women outnumber men usually about 60% women to 40% men. That, or find a denomination that skews heavily female and join it. You'll get a wife in no time.

I remember seeing a good chart in Why Men Hate Going to Church... Doing digging here:

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Blade Runner

Pelican
Orthodox
Is it possibly that the degree to which there are faithful people is low so it's that much harder, or that in a culture that affects women to a much greater degree, there aren't that many reasonably attractive women (younger women willing to consider pairing off) to be pursued by men, of whom there are a larger relative percentage who are successful, thereby increasing their expectations, right or wrong.
 

Zeknichov

Sparrow
I'm 32yo. For me, ideally I'd say 26yo is around my cutoff for age when I'm filtering people. I'll give any woman a chance at any age but in my experience past 26yo, women become unsuitable for relationships.

Sadly, I don't see this number changing and I believe I'm reaching the end of the line where I can still date 26yos. Most women don't like large age gaps anymore.

I've dated every age you can imagine with the youngest being 19go while I was 30yo and oldest being 38yo when I was 31yo. I am 100% convinced women are only suitable for marriage 18-26yo and outside of that it's game over. You're making a ton of compromises for women older than this generally speaking and none of the compromises I know, will likely make me happy. I'd rather just not be in a committed relationship with these older women.

I'm currently dating a 24yo girl (it won't go anywhere) and she calls me old man so uhhhh yeah.

I honestly really really really wish I could date girls in their 30s but I've never met one I didn't find insufferable. These women hold back their love for men and treat relationships like transactions. The emotion seems completely killed in all regards with older women. That doesn't work for me.
 

Joe316

Robin
Sadly, I don't see this number changing and I believe I'm reaching the end of the line where I can still date 26yos. Most women don't like large age gaps anymore.

Women do what the mainstream narrative tells them. When the TV tells them to date old guys, they're all going to start dating old guys.

I am 100% convinced women are only suitable for marriage 18-26yo and outside of that it's game over.

It has been so for thousands of years.

I'm currently dating a 24yo girl (it won't go anywhere) and she calls me old man so uhhhh yeah.

I sometimes call myself (almost 40) old man, but I'm not insecure about it. Be confident in your seniority! A woman might call you "old man" because maturity is her schtick and what she's looking for instead of soy boys. A 24 years old might be ready to settle down and deliberately choosing from the 30+ age bracket.

I honestly really really really wish I could date girls in their 30s but I've never met one I didn't find insufferable. These women hold back their love for men and treat relationships like transactions. The emotion seems completely killed in all regards with older women. That doesn't work for me.

Without Christ in a relationship, it will always go nowhere. Women who aren't able and willing to submit to God, won't submit to their husband. So you naturally end up with a business partnership.
 

Lian

Pigeon
Gold Member
I'm pushing 40, and fortunately look a bit younger than my age. I left the US permanently and moved to Europe.
For me, currently, 22 (still "college-aged"), and a virgin.

For any man say under 55, I'd say 25 should still be the upper limit, for reasons mentioned at length. For 55+, I'd say 29. Is this difficult or impossible where you live? People have had success with Christian online dating. Or, you could have saved up enough money for a comfortable retirement in many places, and you could, and in most cases if you're in the West should for various reasons, move. The world is a big place.

As also mentioned, the only reason for marriage is children. Speaking of all this, the only thing a girl has to offer a man that he can't get elsewhere is her virginity. Need intimacy, can't cope? While I am a budding Christian and I am certainly not giving this as advice (and have never done this myself), a prostitute can be hired. Someone to cook? Hire a chef, or learn to enjoy cooking as I've started to. A caretaker? Nannies exist. But I digress, point being there is no need to get married just to have a roommate you sleep with.

Though I'm doing everything in my power to set myself up for success, including working hard in both career and health/fitness, and putting myself in the best environments I can, I'm starting to believe it really all is up to God. Of the thousands of girls I've met over the years, at the end of the day, all it takes is just one. And if it's not in the cards, as someone said men are better equipped for solitude than women. If I focus on my career and work hard enough, a comfortable life in a locale I enjoy, with time to enjoy some nice food and wine, to read and ponder about life and get closer to God, with friends to converse with, maybe in a foreign language I'll learn, is far from the worst thing I can think of. And that's the kind of quality, stress-free life attractive to girls anyway, now that I think about it, so really the pursuit is the same.

To help defeat some of the toxic limiting beliefs out there, just yesterday, on public transport, I started some banter with a cute girl about how she must have just woken up wearing pajamas (turns out works part-time studying to be a nurse). We had some back and forth, she asked my age, I asked how old she thought I was. 27. I laughed and told her "more or less." Asked hers, just turned 18. We kept chatting and laughing, I say we should get a coffee sometime, some back and forth on it, again she asks my age, "27 right?" I laugh, close enough. I take her #, I call her before she gets off so she has it. From the short convo, she is close to her still-together parents, interested in a feminine pursuit, agrees covid is essentially all BS, seems feminine and pleasant. Lot screened out there. Who knows? Statistically it'll lead to nothing for me. But the point is, I don't care what any degenerate, decaying society has to say about "age appropriateness," or morals or anything else for that matter. When speaking to her, in no way whatsoever did I convey that I felt something wrong with my interest, or that there was anything other than healthy and normal about it. In fact, I got the feeling with the age questions she was more making sure she wasn't too young for my standards, instead of that I was too old for hers. Once I feel financially stable and personally ready to have kids, should I want them then, I believe if it's in God's plan, then it certainly can happen.
 

bucky

Ostrich
I'm pushing 40, and fortunately look a bit younger than my age. I left the US permanently and moved to Europe.
For me, currently, 22 (still "college-aged"), and a virgin.

For any man say under 55, I'd say 25 should still be the upper limit, for reasons mentioned at length. For 55+, I'd say 29. Is this difficult or impossible where you live? People have had success with Christian online dating. Or, you could have saved up enough money for a comfortable retirement in many places, and you could, and in most cases if you're in the West should for various reasons, move. The world is a big place.

As also mentioned, the only reason for marriage is children. Speaking of all this, the only thing a girl has to offer a man that he can't get elsewhere is her virginity. Need intimacy, can't cope? While I am a budding Christian and I am certainly not giving this as advice (and have never done this myself), a prostitute can be hired. Someone to cook? Hire a chef, or learn to enjoy cooking as I've started to. A caretaker? Nannies exist. But I digress, point being there is no need to get married just to have a roommate you sleep with.

Though I'm doing everything in my power to set myself up for success, including working hard in both career and health/fitness, and putting myself in the best environments I can, I'm starting to believe it really all is up to God. Of the thousands of girls I've met over the years, at the end of the day, all it takes is just one. And if it's not in the cards, as someone said men are better equipped for solitude than women. If I focus on my career and work hard enough, a comfortable life in a locale I enjoy, with time to enjoy some nice food and wine, to read and ponder about life and get closer to God, with friends to converse with, maybe in a foreign language I'll learn, is far from the worst thing I can think of. And that's the kind of quality, stress-free life attractive to girls anyway, now that I think about it, so really the pursuit is the same.

To help defeat some of the toxic limiting beliefs out there, just yesterday, on public transport, I started some banter with a cute girl about how she must have just woken up wearing pajamas (turns out works part-time studying to be a nurse). We had some back and forth, she asked my age, I asked how old she thought I was. 27. I laughed and told her "more or less." Asked hers, just turned 18. We kept chatting and laughing, I say we should get a coffee sometime, some back and forth on it, again she asks my age, "27 right?" I laugh, close enough. I take her #, I call her before she gets off so she has it. From the short convo, she is close to her still-together parents, interested in a feminine pursuit, agrees covid is essentially all BS, seems feminine and pleasant. Lot screened out there. Who knows? Statistically it'll lead to nothing for me. But the point is, I don't care what any degenerate, decaying society has to say about "age appropriateness," or morals or anything else for that matter. When speaking to her, in no way whatsoever did I convey that I felt something wrong with my interest, or that there was anything other than healthy and normal about it. In fact, I got the feeling with the age questions she was more making sure she wasn't too young for my standards, instead of that I was too old for hers. Once I feel financially stable and personally ready to have kids, should I want them then, I believe if it's in God's plan, then it certainly can happen.
Funny, my wife was in her late twenties and I was in my early forties when we met. You'd have criticized me for her being too old when I met her, whereas IRL I got constant comments about her being too young until she hit 30.

Good luck with your quest for a 22 year old virigin as you near middle age. You'll have to let us know how that works out.
 

Lian

Pigeon
Gold Member
Funny, my wife was in her late twenties and I was in my early forties when we met. You'd have criticized me for her being too old when I met her, whereas IRL I got constant comments about her being too young until she hit 30.

Good luck with your quest for a 22 year old virigin as you near middle age. You'll have to let us know how that works out.

What exactly is the point of your post, defeatism? To root for my failure?

You were early 40s and your wife was not much older than 25, which isn't far from what I said, but what I said is just one person's thoughts based on his experience. And this is just my individual path anyway, which as I mentioned could very well end up in solitude, or some variation of what I'm pursuing: close, but not quite. Do I wish I would have done things very differently many years ago, instead of wasting so many years pursuing the wrong things in the wrong ways? Sure. I'm trying to navigate clown world best I can like all of us.
 

bucky

Ostrich
What exactly is the point of your post, defeatism? To root for my failure?

You were early 40s and your wife was not much older than 25, which isn't far from what I'd recommend. And these are just my personal opinions and my individual path anyway, which as I mentioned could very well end up in solitude. I'm trying to navigate clown world best I can like all of us.
Certainly not to hope for your failure. Sure, a 22 year old virgin at your age is a pretty unrealistic requirement and I don't think other guys should try to hold themselves to that standard, but if you manage to pull it off it would be interesting for me and helpful for the single guys to hear how you did it. I feel incredibly fortunate and blessed to have met a virgin in her late twenties when I was early middle aged, and I've had several DMs from forum members asking for details and advice on how I did it.
 

Joe316

Robin
Funny, my wife was in her late twenties and I was in my early forties when we met. You'd have criticized me for her being too old when I met her, whereas IRL I got constant comments about her being too young until she hit 30.

You made a reasonable choice and it worked out.

Good luck with your quest for a 22 year old virigin as you near middle age. You'll have to let us know how that works out.

A guy his age could still pull mid-to-late-20s looking for something serious and discern a wife submitting into his lead.

Or he could write essays about 22 years old virgins until he hits 50 and then realize, that women 25-29 don't care about gramps twice their age.
 

Lian

Pigeon
Gold Member
Certainly not to hope for your failure. Sure, a 22 year old virgin at your age is a pretty unrealistic requirement and I don't think other guys should try to hold themselves to that standard, but if you manage to pull it off it would be interesting for me and helpful for the single guys to hear how you did it. I feel incredibly fortunate and blessed to have met a virgin in her late twenties when I was early middle aged, and I've had several DMs from forum members asking for details and advice on how I did it.
She was a virgin in her late twenties? Well consider me one of those guys asking for details and advice then, if you posted elsewhere and don't mind linking or PMing me. To me, that's more important, and it's just very rare that a girl remains one past around 24 or 25, though I have met a couple over the years (one 23 or 24, the other 25 or 26, can't quite remember).

A guy his age could still pull mid-to-late-20s looking for something serious and discern a wife submitting into his lead.

Or he could write essays about 22 years old virgins until he hits 50 and then realize, that women 25-29 don't care about gramps twice their age.

Over 10 years later I'm writing essays on here on 22 year old virgins? I'm contributing more than you are by attacking and criticizing someone who is actually working on his goals with the cards he has, despite the stress and constant specter of failure, and with one eye on the clock.

And, if I may ask, who are you to make this authoritative statement, implying you either have more experience than I do with women, or know my personal situation?
"A guy his age could still pull mid-to-late-20s looking for something serious and discern a wife submitting into his lead."
 
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