Why do so many middle aged men feel so lost? (Telegraph, UK)

[AnonymousBosch]

Sebastian Morley, a former commander in the SAS who has seen tours in Northern Ireland, Iraq and Afghanistan, agrees that men have lost their way. “I find them hard to deal with,” he says. “They are either super-competitive or massively defeatist.”

He runs courses for women at The Camp, a weight-loss and fitness boot camp based in Scotland. “I find women are motivated, eager, easy to deal with and naturally empathetic towards each other,” Morley says. “There is a spirit that exists between women that really kicks in when they are in difficulties. They help each other and they are also more willing and able to talk about their hopes and fears. This is why women can change their lives around – they have that mutable ability to do what is best for them and their families.”

I'm fascinated by this section. It's so out of place.

My first thought: this guy is telling women exactly what they want to hear to financially-exploit them.

He has no respect for men, and doesn't work with them, so why on earth is he interviewed for this piece?

It's an obvious commercial.

So, I started researching the camp:

"Drop a dress size and get fit in one week"

Telling women what they want to hear.

:tard:

We are the UK’s original boot camp for women. We are consistently praised as the most unique and successful week long women only weight loss holiday camp running in Europe.

The site keeps praising their 'beautiful surroundings', a 'luxury estate' in Scotland and 'Mansion Resort' in Spain, from only 1350 pounds.

I notice the Lifestyle Porn shots of the camp, notice the itinerary constantly reinforces meals and 'snacks' after every activity, and realised this is aimed at privileged women.

The best boot camp in Europe voted by Tatler, Elle and The Telegraph. Specifically designed for health, safety and sustainability.

That's the concern of a certain type of woman.

The thing of 'spirit of women / turning their lives around...' sounds like the kind of rhetoric you'd sell to middle-aged, far past their shelf life, narcissistic divorcees with money, who are incapable or recognising their beauty has faded and their personalities are only attractive to other women as obnoxious as they are.

Basically, the natural life progression I'd expect for a privileged female typist.

I wonder who this Lucy Cavendish Typist is. Would she be a beautiful young woman, living the high life, happily-married? I doubted it via the spin of the article, which is targeted at labelling a specific age group of men as being 'failures'. Specifically, the group that an entitled, single typist would believe she is 'entitled' to, and is angry at them repeatedly-failing to recognise her obvious beauty and important, glamour-filled career typing out op-ed pieces that swerve wildly between bitterness and pathetic desperation to prove they still have sexual value (1).

So I looked up her bio:

She lives in Oxfordshire with her four children, two dogs, two cats, a horse, a pony, two goldfish and four chickens (now suddenly sadly deceased!) Lucy is thinking of getting a goat.

Reading the article, you didn't really expect there'd be a man in the picture, did you?

Picture as expected:

I'm sure her co-hags in the media all have attended the Camp, so she is simply using an article on men failing her to signify to the Media Typist Clique that she's experienced with The Camp.

As expected, yet again, her article in the Times:

Why I took my ten-year-old son to a camp for weight loss.

No prizes for guessing where it was.

Women have consistent motivations as to their behaviour, and it makes all of their Typing absolutely-worthless to any man with an intelligent mind.

----

(1) Evidence this kind of Pathetic Desperation. See this woeful shart that I can't even call Typing:

Lucy Cavendish is rescued from a bad date by a handsome friend

How the other half lives: on a disastrous day out with a man who doesn't talk to her, Lucy Cavendish texts a friend for help

It’s only when I am safely ensconced in the Ladies that I text Handsome Friend.

Note the way the man is described with the qualifier. He's an actor playing his role in her narcissistic fantasy, with no interior or exterior life of his own.

I have no idea what else to do. I can’t walk back into the racing lunch. I have huffed out, leaving the Horrible Man and White Knight probably still wondering what has gone on. But I couldn’t stay. It felt so humiliating and actually I could think of a million and one things I’d rather being doing, like going home to see my children.

The problem is, I don’t know how to get home. I booked a taxi to get here but WK had told me he’d take me home. I don’t have enough money to taxi back.

"I'm a fully-grown adult who can't look after myself and handle minor problems in my life, yet I believe women are naturally-superior to men!"

There is no other option but to get someone to come and pick me up. That someone, I realise, has to be Handsome Friend – mainly because he is the only person I can think of who might actually come and rescue me.

Said by the woman who sold this quote from the guy she unsuccessfully-flirted with at The Camp. "There is a spirit that exists between women that really kicks in when they are in difficulties. They help each other."

“HELP!” I text him from the safety of a cubicle. “I am stuck at the races. All gone horribly wrong. Come and get me now before I stick my head in a bowl!” I suddenly realise this is all rather familiar. I once texted him when I was stuck in Scotland – it’s a long story – and he did offer to drive up and grab me if I really needed him to. Surely the races are closer than the Hebrides?

"I have a handsome man at my beck and call who will do anything for me!"

I hear my phone ping. He texts back: “On my way…” Half an hour later, HF pulls up outside the racecourse. He gets out of his car. “Oh dear,” he says. “What on earth is going on?”

“Can’t talk now,” I say. “Please just get me out of here.”

We get in the car and set off. “You’ve dressed up,” HF says. “I surmise you have been on a date and it has gone wrong.”

"I believe this is how people actually speak. Notice he said 'surmise' rather than casual language. Have you noticed he's not only handsome, but smart!"

I nod, and look out of the window. “All my dates go horribly wrong,” I say. “I am the kiss of death to dating.”

“Oh dear,” he says again, but I can see he is desperate to smile. He contains himself, though. We then sit in silence.

I am thinking about what I am going to say to WK. I have just abandoned him. “I may have been a tad hasty,” I say.

HF looks at me and smiles broadly. “Oh, Lucy,” he says, “you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t do those rash things. Now, you look totally lovely and it would be a shame to go straight home, so…” He turns left. “There’s a lovely pub down here. Let’s have a drink and you can tell me all about it.”

This last paragraph is, frankly, embarrassing and a little sad. In quick succession he:

- loves her for who she is as a person and wouldn't want to change her; ('you wouldn't be you').

- recognises she's a wild, firey spirit; ('rash things').

- praises her beauty; ('you look totally lovely').

- is eager to listen to her problems; ('you can tell me all about it').

All she left out is the fact Handsome Friend is from Canada.

Since what I just quoted is the entire article, she basically just wrote an article trying to convince readers that she can still control handsome, intelligent men with her beauty. It's what I keep saying about Female Typists writing to gain narcissistic supply from their readers. Every keystroke is planned for envy-farm her female readers.

 

[Vaun]

Sebastian Morley, a former commander in the SAS who has seen tours in Northern Ireland, Iraq and Afghanistan, agrees that men have lost their way. “I find them hard to deal with,” he says. “They are either super-competitive or massively defeatist.”

He runs courses for women at The Camp, a weight-loss and fitness boot camp based in Scotland. “I find women are motivated, eager, easy to deal with and naturally empathetic towards each other,” Morley says. “There is a spirit that exists between women that really kicks in when they are in difficulties. They help each other and they are also more willing and able to talk about their hopes and fears. This is why women can change their lives around – they have that mutable ability to do what is best for them and their families.”

I'm fascinated by this section. It's so out of place.

:mindblown:

blowing minds from across the pond

or that our sensitive warrior fat camp managing mr wonderful paid The Telegraph to write the "article" as an advertorial

 

[AnonymousBosch]

or that our sensitive warrior fat camp managing mr wonderful paid The Telegraph to write the "article" as an advertorial

I wondered that at first, and I'm sure there's all expenses weeks for the benefit of the press, but I think this sadder reality is much more likely: he's an healthy, ex-SAS Alpha Male who speaks like a Male Feminist and values women's strength and emotions whilst running a successful business for privileged women. Obviously, he's exactly who Lucy who believe she deserves, so she's been looking for any excuse - not matter how feeble - to re-enter his orbit.

It probably went like this:

- All-expenses trip to Fat Camp for herself

- Crush established on Sebastian

- Much bean flicking

- "How can I get back there so he talks to me again?"

- Decides her kid is too fat

- Sells story idea to paper to get all expenses trip for hippo son

- Takes him to Fat Camp

- Sebastian still doesn't close

- Much frustration and more bean flicking

- Increasingly-tenuous excuses for 'calling him' for 'opinions' for stories in exchange for the obvious promotion

- 2 years from now: "I need to research a story on Quantum Physics. Physicists are usually men. Not enough women in STEM. Who can I call. Sebastian is a man. I'd better get his opinion."

I'm calling it now: Sebastian has game, and realises he can dangle sad, 40-somethings with some casual charm for free exposure.

Pic as expected. "Jump ladies, jump!"

 

[Dusty]

I'm calling bullshit on this entire article.

Agreed.

As I note in post #6, the Lee story is a complete fabrication. The guy gets divorsed then has sex with 15 women in one month. Which of you playas get new strange every other day?

If someone posted that on RvF, they'd be band for tall tale big ballerism.

:baller:

 

[Kizman]

This article is clearly biased, as most middle aged men I know (uncles, family friends, etc) who live alone cope much better than single women of the same age.

I'm pulling this quote out from somewhere (can't remember who said it) - " You can't threaten a man with peace and quiet".

 

[AnonymousBosch]

More on the Typist:

But it is being a mother that has changed her life. In this guise, she writes a column for Stella magazine for the Sunday Telegraph about her life as a Country Mother of Four. A few years ago, she was asked to take her experiences as a mother, a wife, a partner and an ex-partner to write a fictitious book. Her heroine, Samantha Smythe, is loosely based on herself

Standard Issue stuff, every Typist's favourite subject is herself. Me! Me! Me!

I watched an old movie called 'Shock Treatment' on the weekend, having not seen it since I was a kid, and was shocked to realise what seemed like insane, outlandish concepts that could never, ever happen to my 10-year-old mind - which is why I thought it was a stupid movie - had all come true.

It included:

- Reality Television: a nobody girl made into a star by her and her family being filmed living their daily routine, with Kid Me thinking 'no-one would ever watch normal people sitting around talking!';

- Branded Mental Health: a Fast Food magnet uses the girl to promote the concept of packaged mental health to the nation. (Which is a mainstay of Oprah Network productions such as Dr Phil (Mental) or , Dr Oz (Physical). Meanwhile, Kid Me thinking this was an unfeasible idea, not realising lifestyle aspiration is as marketable as a hamburger.

- Attention-Whoring Narcissism: the adulation means the girl becomes a uncontrollable, grandiose monster, who thinks everyone should be honoured to entertain her every word and thought. Check out her theme song. It's every Millennial Girl's Facebook Wall.

How was this movie made in 1981? How did it so accurately-predict the future.



Lyric:

There's just the two of me
Alone at last together
We've got the luck so far
We are my lucky star

Deep in the heart of me
I love every part of me
All I can see in me
Is danger and ecstasy
One thing there couldn't be
Is any more me in me

This is the me of me
Me me me
Me me
Me me me
Me me me

I am my destiny
Je croie en toujour en moi, ha ha
I'd never lie to me
I'd be willing to die for moi
I'll pray every day to me
And here's what I'd say to me

This is the me of me
Me me me
Me me
Me me me
Me me me
Me me me

Oh, me me
Me me me
Yeah, me me
Look at me
Moi moi

 

[Suits]

HF looks at me and smiles broadly. “Oh, Lucy,” he says, “you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t do those rash things. Now, you look totally lovely and it would be a shame to go straight home, so…” He turns left. “There’s a lovely pub down here. Let’s have a drink and you can tell me all about it.”

I do not believe that this conversation ever happened.

I believe that this is an "improved" dialogue based on a lame attempt by a beta orbiter to get laid.

Here's how it really went down.

HF looks at me and tries to smile. “Uh,” he says, “I think you are, uh, fine the way you are. Let's, uh, go get a drink and, uh, talk. Unless you don't want to, cause, uh, I could just take you home, or, uh, something.”

 

[SlickyBoy]

...he's an healthy, ex-SAS Alpha Male who speaks like a Male Feminist and values women's strength and emotions whilst running a successful business for privileged women.

Bravo on the follow up! The minute I read that bit about an ex SAS guy blathering on about how men just can't get it together to work as a team, my BS flag went up. No man would last one day in SAS (hell, they'd never make it past the qualification course) without being able to work as a team.

That said it does look like he's at least set up a popular and lucrative product catering to a large customer base. Legions of UK cat ladies flick the bean nightly over the prospects of paying to breathe the same air as him. Lol!

 

[kazz]

The author of the article is exactly as I pictured in my head while reading. This dribble gets churned out alot; written like the frivolous gossip women love, not an intelligent comment in it, attempting to shame men, make women feel better. Nothing new here.

 

[Foolsgo1d]

If this guy is selling his SAS boot camp style training it is only part of a fad. I see these ex-military instructor training sessions all over the UK. They take place in parks and all the hip crowd join them to get through Tough Mudder.

Its a sales pitch.