Why do so many white men prefer Asian women?

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
Ha, you got me there! In all seriousness, though, the "face saving" goes deeper than just simple courtesy or politeness as we know it in the West, particularly because it's related to the far more hierarchical structure of their societies. It's not so much about just saving your own face as it is about saving the other's face. It's a kind of indirectness and implicitness which can be very hard to decode if you're not used to the local culture and customs. You have to read between the lines a lot more and the word "no" basically does not exist. Perhaps "high-context societies" is how they're best described in that sense. To be fair, I think there's a certain elegance to it compared to the crudeness us Westerners tend to be prone to these days. Yet it can also lead to hypocrisy in the sense that people are forced to neglect openness, honesty or sincerity in order to show respect for rank and authority. At least that's based on my own experiences and observations from others on this.
I agree with what you said. I do think a lot of Americans forgot the idea of 'saving face' and are often too outspoken and seem quite happy to be loud and embarrass others in public. This often makes the other person have to be more aggressive than necessary to protect their image and now a big argument or fight happens. Of course, some Asians go to far to avoid confrontation and make things worse by not dealing with the issue in a direct but polite way which can be done if you discuss things in a private area to protect everybody's face. However, I have seen a lot of loud and quite public arguments in China especially among older people. I think South Korea and perhaps Japan might have more of a stronger culture of 'saving face' although it does exist in China as well among many people. Perhaps someone who lived in South Korea or Japan can give more information (I lived in China but only visited South Korea on a few occasions).

I read 'How to Make Friends and Influence People' a couple times and some of these ideas were discussed (not the term 'saving face' but similar concepts). One example mentioned in how Lincoln nearly got in a duel because he publicly criticized someone. He learned a valuable lesson from this and learned how to 'save face' and how to deal with people in conflicts better. I highly recommend this book (which is free to download). A lot of Americans have forgotten these ideas and go to far the other way in being too direct and critical and often in a rude way. Part one relates to this.


Both cultures should work on some happy middle ground regarding conflict resolution.
 

pathos

Sparrow
Orthodox Inquirer
Of course, some Asians go to far to avoid confrontation and make things worse by not dealing with the issue in a direct but polite way which can be done if you discuss things in a private area to protect everybody's face. However, I have seen a lot of loud and quite public arguments in China especially among older people. I think South Korea and perhaps Japan might have more of a stronger culture of 'saving face' although it does exist in China as well among many people.
From what I've read/heard, Mao's Cultural Revolution may explain why modern mainland China is different and has lost some of the traditional notions of politeness. It would be interesting to hear the perspectives of people who've lived there. Korea strikes me as more Confucian in their overall mindset compared to modern-day China.

I agree a middle ground has to be found, especially with mixed couples. Easier said than done but depends on the person and family.
 

pathos

Sparrow
Orthodox Inquirer
I do think a lot of Americans forgot the idea of 'saving face' and are often too outspoken and seem quite happy to be loud and embarrass others in public. This often makes the other person have to be more aggressive [..]
I think so, too. It's a struggle to find a balance in the age of Twitter one-liners and it seems we've lost the art of being courteous and honest at the same time. One thing that could undo some of the damage would be classical literature which is helpful in building a broader vocabulary. But in the end it's also a mindset that has to be cultivated.
 

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
Wow, 47 pages. Did we get a solid answer? Smaller framed and tend to be less westernized than non-asians?
It is a question with not just one right answer because every man has their own reasons. Your answer is pretty concise and accurate for many though. It is funny to think that 'westernized' used to not mean a bad thing and now I think of almost all bad things as being 'western' or 'Americanized' even when I know they technically are not only western (ex. tattoos, drug abuse, excessive swearing, porn, etc...).
 

kamoz

Kingfisher
Gold Member
This hits the nail on the head for the most part. The only things I'll add are that you don't have to go overseas to find one, and many have the same religion as you (i.e. Catholic, Protestant). Otherwise, this post can be pinned to the top and this thread closed.

The odds of finding a stable, submissive, kind, young, unmarried, fertile white girl in America in 2021 are orders of magnitude lower than what you can find by going to areas like Asia. That's really all it is.

Most people have a desire to have a family that looks like them. I look at our family portrait and I'm a bit sad that I might not be able to carry on my lineage that way. In an ideal world, I'd love a northern European / American southern girl but I know from dating them, that it's an extremely difficult prospect. So you can make a compromise and find a woman that checks all those boxes that American girls used to, but has different culture, religion, language, geography, and skin color than you. Or you can roll the dice and hope you find the needle in the haystack here in America, and possibly grow old and frustrated while doing so.

We all make our decisions based on how comfortable we are with the options we are given. It's really not any more complicated than that.
I don't think there should ever be any set rule of "Never couple up with someone from another country" or "Completely give up on American women." ...
 

zeroshame

 
Banned
Orthodox
When it comes to white man/asian woman couples, the most common version I see is something like on this picture: middle aged white man, oftentimes divorced and a happy, good natured but rather hard to look at PhillipinaView attachment 34515.

No joke the vast majority of Asian women are literally ugly as sin, only ugly neckbeards find them attractive .

If you're in a relationship with an Asian women you're probably undesirable to any other race of women.
 

thetruewhitenorth

Woodpecker
Orthodox
No joke the vast majority of Asian women are literally ugly as sin, only ugly neckbeards find them attractive .

If you're in a relationship with an Asian women you're probably undesirable to any other race of women.

Sounds harsh, but that has been my experience, at least where I live, it is VERY rary you can spot a good looking Asian woman.

I have seen hundreds of them and most are short, pudgy, overweight, with unpleasantly looking faces.

However, what I do admire about Philipinas specifically though is their genuine, happy vibe.
 

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
Sounds harsh, but that has been my experience, at least where I live, it is VERY rary you can spot a good looking Asian woman.

I have seen hundreds of them and most are short, pudgy, overweight, with unpleasantly looking faces.

However, what I do admire about Philipinas specifically though is their genuine, happy vibe.
You know Asia is quite huge right? Lebanon, Iran, and Turkey are known for attractive women and they are in Asia as well.

You must live in an area with many Filipina maids. I remember visiting Hong Kong and seeing thousands of maids from The Philippines and Indonesia (it was their typical day off and you see thousands hanging out in parks and on bridge overpasses) and being shocked that none of them were even mildly attractive. However, attractive women exist in those countries. I guess attractive women there choose not to become maids though.

I was curious and checked about Lebanon. Are you telling me that all of these women are ugly?

 

thetruewhitenorth

Woodpecker
Orthodox
You know Asia is quite huge right? Lebanon, Iran, and Turkey are known for attractive women and they are in Asia as well.

You must live in an area with many Filipina maids. I remember visiting Hong Kong and seeing thousands of maids from The Philippines and Indonesia (it was their typical day off and you see thousands hanging out in parks and on bridge overpasses) and being shocked that none of them were even mildly attractive. However, attractive women exist in those countries. I guess attractive women there choose not to become maids though.

I was curious and checked about Lebanon. Are you telling me that all of these women are ugly?


By "Asian" most of us understand "Orientals". Lebanese women would more likely could be classified as "Arabic".

I doubt when someone says "meet my Asian gitlfriend", people expect to see a Turkish or Persian lady.

Lots of Arabic women are very pretty, yes. Oftentimes, I tend to confuse them with Latinas looks wise.

One way for me to tell an Arabic woman from the Latin one is thick, painted eyebrows on the former.
 

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
By "Asian" most of us understand "Orientals". Lebanese women would more likely could be classified as "Arabic".

I doubt when someone says "meet my Asian gitlfriend", people expect to see a Turkish or Persian lady.

Lots of Arabic women are very pretty, yes. Oftentimes, I tend to confuse them with Latinas looks wise.

One way for me to tell an Arabic woman from the Latin one is thick, painted eyebrows on the former.
That is why I dislike the title of the thread as it is not specific. Even if you take the Middle East out of the definition of 'Asia' (which you really shouldn't), there are huge cultural and physical differences between women in Sri Lanka, Uzbekistan, Japan, and Mongolia. The author of the thread should have specified certain parts of Asia.

Japan has one of the lowest rates of obesity in the world but you stated many of the Asians you saw are overweight. I am curious which part of 'Asia' the women you see are from and that is why I mentioned Filipina and Indonesian maids (most of them were a bit overweight).

Malay Malaysian women I saw in Malaysia also tend to be slightly overweight and slightly unattractive (although few are obese). Most were about 3-4 on the subjective beauty scale and few were below or above this range.
 

thetruewhitenorth

Woodpecker
Orthodox
That is why I dislike the title of the thread as it is not specific. Even if you take the Middle East out of the definition of 'Asia' (which you really shouldn't), there are huge cultural and physical differences between women in Sri Lanka, Uzbekistan, Japan, and Mongolia. The author of the thread should have specified certain parts of Asia.

Japan has one of the lowest rates of obesity in the world but you stated many of the Asians you saw are overweight. I am curious which part of 'Asia' the women you see are from and that is why I mentioned Filipina and Indonesian maids (most of them were a bit overweight).

Malay Malaysian women I saw in Malaysia also tend to be slightly overweight and slightly unattractive (although few are obese). Most were about 3-4 on the subjective beauty scale and few were below or above this range.

I see mainly Chinese and Philipina women around where I live. As a Russian person Im well familiar with how Asian women from ex Soviet countries look like - lots of them slim and feminine.

I agree, the thread creator could have specified what he meant by "Asian women".
 

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
I see mainly Chinese and Philipina women around where I live. As a Russian person Im well familiar with how Asian women from ex Soviet countries look like - lots of them slim and feminine.

I agree, the thread creator could have specified what he meant by "Asian women".
A lot of Chinese (as with many other foreign) women adapt crappy western eating habits (at least in the USA) and get as chunky as Americans from other races. In China, plenty of women are slim. The Philippines diet is not really good and many like fried and sweet food way too much. It doesn't seem there is much of a fitness or hiking culture there as opposed to South Korea or even China either. If Filipinas adapted healthier eating and exercise habits, many would likely be attractive (or at least greatly improved from the present situation).

I am not trying to pick on the Philippines. Maybe being in a hot and humid nations discourages them from exercising more. However, the Chinese-Malays and Chinese-Singaporeans and Taiwanese are mostly slim and also live in hot environments.

I know people have different standards of beauty. I think it is hard to find attractive women from Papau New Guinea and the Solomon Islands, but obviously plenty of men find women there attractive as they find marriage partners and their populations have been steadily growing.
 

Denam8487

Sparrow
Catholic
As the RVF's resident East Asian woman simp, I find that East Asian women tend to age well. My mother-in-law is 67 but looks like she's in her late 40s whenever she colors her hair. She literally has no wrinkles on her face, no bags under her eyes and her skin hasn't really started to sag.

Body wise, I'll agree that East Asian women may not have the best physiques as they can skew towards overly thin or plump. But in the NoVA area, I've seen plenty in the gym or martial art studios that are pretty fit and toned so it depends on how much they value their health. My wife got pregnant in under a month of us trying so naturally, I appreciate her wider hips lol.

Facially - I've always preferred dark shiny hair and brown almond shaped eyes so they're the most attractive to me in that regard. Bear in mind that Kelly Hu in Scorpion King is my measure of the most attractive woman.

White women in America hit the wall HARD in their 30s. From all the years of tanning, excess make-up appliance, and poor diet their faces tend to lose collagen and smoothness after they hit the wall or have a couple of babies. Not to mention how dry their hair looks if they've frequently dye it blonde so their roots don't show. And if they don't care of their body, forget about it. How frequently do you see the hot girl from high school or undergrad after she turns 30 and you wonder what the hell happened?
 
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Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
You know Asia is quite huge right? Lebanon, Iran, and Turkey are known for attractive women and they are in Asia as well.

You must live in an area with many Filipina maids. I remember visiting Hong Kong and seeing thousands of maids from The Philippines and Indonesia (it was their typical day off and you see thousands hanging out in parks and on bridge overpasses) and being shocked that none of them were even mildly attractive. However, attractive women exist in those countries. I guess attractive women there choose not to become maids though.

I was curious and checked about Lebanon. Are you telling me that all of these women are ugly?

21, 12, 10, 5 and 3 are as good as any man can hope for if they are feminine and non argumentative, there is no doubt.

Good posts. Usually the middle eastern women have big facial features but voluptuous bodies or can be thin with greater endowments, which is usually the tradeoff. I personally would go for eastern euro and these women over all others, but that is somewhat of an orthodox thing too.
 

Denam8487

Sparrow
Catholic
"non argumentative"

Not to broadly stereotype but I haven't had the best luck with M.E. women in that regard. When I was working at Starbucks way back when I had a Turkish/Lebanese woman tell me that she was "going to kill me" because I gave her regular milk instead of soy milk. I also had a woman working at a deli in Turkey literally scream at me because I asked her which sandwich was mine.

Another time a Turkish/Armenian woman called me an "ugly pig face" because I'm white, I guess?

All were really gorgeous women too but they had their knives out.
 

MartyMcFly

Kingfisher
Other Christian
Not to broadly stereotype but I haven't had the best luck with M.E. women in that regard. When I was working at Starbucks way back when I had a Turkish/Lebanese woman tell me that she was "going to kill me" because I gave her regular milk instead of soy milk. I also had a woman working at a deli in Turkey literally scream at me because I asked her which sandwich was mine.

Another time a Turkish/Armenian woman called me an "ugly pig face" because I'm white, I guess?

All were really gorgeous women too but they had their knives out.
The woman who said she was "going to kill you" was probably flirting. I guess it would depend on tone of voice though. Your city might just have rude people in general. Some cities have a culture that encourages aggression and rudeness.

The women I posted were models and actresses and not likely the best wife material overall despite their beauty. Of course, I am stereotyping these professions as high-maintenance and shallow and this is not always true.

I showed the photos to show that women there are very different looking from women in Japan and the Philippines because I found it surprising someone said the Asians he saw were ugly. I am not disputing what he said though, I know it is possible especially if he didn't have the chance to travel to different parts of Asia and judged by a few he saw in his city. I would find it hard to classify all Asian women as ugly because the continent has such variety.

Personally, I never traveled for leisure in the Middle East and wouldn't know what women are like there. I just remember that Lebanon is famed for beautiful women.
 
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