CelibateYogi
Chicken
I decided to create a new thread given that all the old threads I saw on here completely missed the point.
There's a reason why people keep failing at NoFap. There's a reason why people keep failing at NoPorn.
The old threads all pursue this topic from exactly the wrong way...which keeps making men slip and fall over and over again. In this thread, I wanted to present a radically different way of dealing with PMO.
Much like Roosh, I've had a bit of an awakening over the last few years. I realized the destructiveness of the lifestyle I was pursuing. I was lucky enough to find a wife to get married to -- a traditional woman who had never been with another man before me. Thanks much to the work of Roosh and this forum to help me take the red pill and understand the true nature of the world and women.
But the shadows of porn kept pulling at me.
No amount of NoFap streaks helped me. After 5 days, 10 days, 30 days, I would fail over and over again. For more than 10 years!
Let me tell you my story in brief and then tell you the insight I had that helped me quit porn overnight.
I've shadowed this forum for years, and with a spattering of a few posts, I haven't contributed. This is my contribution, because I sincerely hope that more of us can quit this life destroying addiction once and for all!
My Story
At first, I thought this would be an easy “habit” to kick. I just had to want it. How wrong I was. No matter how hard I tried, nothing seemed to work. This was not just a habit, it was an addiction.
I came from a religious family, so I had definitely picked up that God did not want me to watch these images. I would spend hours praying for help, but time and time again, I would fail. I kept wondering why even after asking God I kept failing. “Has God abandoned me?” I would think as I would relapse again and again.
I carried around an immense amount of guilt every time I would watch these images and videos, and I became detached from my spiritual and religious beliefs, hating myself in the process. Watching porn no longer held any pleasure for me. It was just a compulsion. And I hated myself for it.
“It’s All About The Science,” I naively thought.
I stumbled across a series of videos, articles, and even a book that went into the harmful effects of porn on the brain and body.
I soon became an encyclopedia about how porn was harmful. I could talk to my friends about the negative effects of it better than anyone else. But it didn’t help.
The monster inside would scream. The fight would go on for a day or two at most, and I would slip up again. Relapse. Crash and burn. So, I started to learn “hacks” to help me quit.
I would keep track of the number of days I’d been “pornfree” and hadn’t “fapped”. But something strange would happen when I would hit my best record…I would feel an inexplicable urge to “celebrate” by watching porn. And of course I would fail again.
I started to take cold showers and do pushups to channel this energy. But there are only so many cold showers I can take per day. Only so many pushups a day before I was exhausted.
And every night, my phone would call me and tell me to “have just one peek.” After all, I deserved it from taking those cold showers and working out so hard, right?
I thought if I toned down the images to just “sensual” images, it would be okay. But I would find myself sliding down the path towards the other stuff over and over again. Failure, after failure, after failure for 10+ years.
But I was getting older and I thought that if I could just get into a relationship, this would all go away. I started dating, seeing some incredible people. Having very intimate experiences with them. But porn remained in the background. I would still crave digital images over the company of someone who loved me.
I would watch porn secretly. Keeping it from my partners. Even after I got married, I would still sneak off and watch porn.
It didn’t involve scaring myself with science. It wasn’t about hypnotizing yourself either. It didn’t involve becoming a “fapstronaut” and joining some online community and keeping a counter.
It involved a simple way of “seeing” that changes everything forever, instantly. I started to see why I had failed in the past. Why everyone was doing it wrong!!!
How to Quit Porn Forever--Easily. Without the Withdrawals, Cravings, and Despair.
Most of us here know about the tremendous dangers of porn. Our reasons for quitting range anywhere from the self-hatred and guilt we carry, to being more present when we're meeting other women/partners. Perhaps it's to deepen your relationship with God or yourself.
The reasons are powerful, and we think this alone should help us quit porn forever.
FALSE.
This isn't enough.
The real reason why we keep coming back to porn is because we still do see some benefit to it!
We still think it helps us deal with stress, boredom, anxiety, depression, loneliness, meaninglessness of our lives!!! <-- this is a BIG realization! These benefits often outweigh our reasons for wanting to quit. And that is why we fail.
When you take part in NoFap/NoPorn, this crucial idea REMAINS. So if anything, doing nofap becomes this difficult task of rolling a boulder up a mountain! After all, we are actively fighting against something that helps us relieve us of our stress, boredom, anxiety, loneliness, etc!
So what is the answer? Is it to take on substitutes like exercising and meditation and cold showers? No.
The answer to this conundrum is to see through the LIE! The lie tells us that porn helps us deal with stress, boredom, anxiety, etc of life... This is a complete lie!!!
Porn doesn't relieve us of these things...porn actually either CAUSES it or CONTRIBUTES to it!
How?
Every time you fap, watch porn, your brain goes on a wild ride of chemistry. Once you crash from it and become more desensitized, your brain is LESS able to be happy, to cope with the normal challenges of life. As a result, your baseline wellness goes down. Your baseline becomes lower and lower with each session/viewing of porn. Yes, even just "edging" to it takes you down the same path. Your brain becomes flooded.
So of course when you PMO, you get this burst of unnatural stimulus in your brain so you do feel a bit better. But you're still worse off than before. It's like banging your head on the wall constantly so you can feel the "release" of stopping!
With each viewing of porn, you create a bigger void than you fill.
Once you can FULLY get this, porn will no longer hold any power over you. It will not take ANY effort to quit it at all. It will be effortless.
Porn doesn't relieve misery, it causes it!
Therefore, there are NO benefits to porn at all. Even the ones you held on to about porn being able to help you with your stress, anxiety, boredom, loneliness, etc. Porn only contributes to it!
This is exactly what the entire NoFap thread is missing! They are all fighting against porn. They are "resisting it". They are counting days they haven't fapped. But all this still ends up assuming that porn is something good! So of course after their 30-60-90 day streak, how do they celebrate? THEY WATCH PORN!
This misses the entire point! Until there is some benefit seen in porn, you will keep failing. I can't even get into the profound ways this clouds our ability to engage with life.
Anyways! That's all I got. I know I threw a lot of stuff out here, and I'm happy to clarify further as needed. I actually spent the last few weeks coaching a few men for free to see if this can work for them to quit porn. And the results look very very positive.
I'm now free from this poison and am happy to answer more questions about this approach with others. I am putting together a longer ebook as well to help as many men quit this once and for all!
Please let me know how I can help you.
There's a reason why people keep failing at NoFap. There's a reason why people keep failing at NoPorn.
The old threads all pursue this topic from exactly the wrong way...which keeps making men slip and fall over and over again. In this thread, I wanted to present a radically different way of dealing with PMO.
Much like Roosh, I've had a bit of an awakening over the last few years. I realized the destructiveness of the lifestyle I was pursuing. I was lucky enough to find a wife to get married to -- a traditional woman who had never been with another man before me. Thanks much to the work of Roosh and this forum to help me take the red pill and understand the true nature of the world and women.
But the shadows of porn kept pulling at me.
No amount of NoFap streaks helped me. After 5 days, 10 days, 30 days, I would fail over and over again. For more than 10 years!
Let me tell you my story in brief and then tell you the insight I had that helped me quit porn overnight.
I've shadowed this forum for years, and with a spattering of a few posts, I haven't contributed. This is my contribution, because I sincerely hope that more of us can quit this life destroying addiction once and for all!
My Story
At first, I thought this would be an easy “habit” to kick. I just had to want it. How wrong I was. No matter how hard I tried, nothing seemed to work. This was not just a habit, it was an addiction.
I came from a religious family, so I had definitely picked up that God did not want me to watch these images. I would spend hours praying for help, but time and time again, I would fail. I kept wondering why even after asking God I kept failing. “Has God abandoned me?” I would think as I would relapse again and again.
I carried around an immense amount of guilt every time I would watch these images and videos, and I became detached from my spiritual and religious beliefs, hating myself in the process. Watching porn no longer held any pleasure for me. It was just a compulsion. And I hated myself for it.
“It’s All About The Science,” I naively thought.
I stumbled across a series of videos, articles, and even a book that went into the harmful effects of porn on the brain and body.
I soon became an encyclopedia about how porn was harmful. I could talk to my friends about the negative effects of it better than anyone else. But it didn’t help.
The monster inside would scream. The fight would go on for a day or two at most, and I would slip up again. Relapse. Crash and burn. So, I started to learn “hacks” to help me quit.
I would keep track of the number of days I’d been “pornfree” and hadn’t “fapped”. But something strange would happen when I would hit my best record…I would feel an inexplicable urge to “celebrate” by watching porn. And of course I would fail again.
I started to take cold showers and do pushups to channel this energy. But there are only so many cold showers I can take per day. Only so many pushups a day before I was exhausted.
And every night, my phone would call me and tell me to “have just one peek.” After all, I deserved it from taking those cold showers and working out so hard, right?
I thought if I toned down the images to just “sensual” images, it would be okay. But I would find myself sliding down the path towards the other stuff over and over again. Failure, after failure, after failure for 10+ years.
But I was getting older and I thought that if I could just get into a relationship, this would all go away. I started dating, seeing some incredible people. Having very intimate experiences with them. But porn remained in the background. I would still crave digital images over the company of someone who loved me.
I would watch porn secretly. Keeping it from my partners. Even after I got married, I would still sneak off and watch porn.
How I was able to quit porn
I kept trying throughout all these years to quit. But then one day, something major just "clicked" inside of me to help me quit it forever. Without relying on your willpower, taking cold showers, and hating yourself with each failure.It didn’t involve scaring myself with science. It wasn’t about hypnotizing yourself either. It didn’t involve becoming a “fapstronaut” and joining some online community and keeping a counter.
It involved a simple way of “seeing” that changes everything forever, instantly. I started to see why I had failed in the past. Why everyone was doing it wrong!!!
How to Quit Porn Forever--Easily. Without the Withdrawals, Cravings, and Despair.
Most of us here know about the tremendous dangers of porn. Our reasons for quitting range anywhere from the self-hatred and guilt we carry, to being more present when we're meeting other women/partners. Perhaps it's to deepen your relationship with God or yourself.
The reasons are powerful, and we think this alone should help us quit porn forever.
FALSE.
This isn't enough.
The real reason why we keep coming back to porn is because we still do see some benefit to it!
We still think it helps us deal with stress, boredom, anxiety, depression, loneliness, meaninglessness of our lives!!! <-- this is a BIG realization! These benefits often outweigh our reasons for wanting to quit. And that is why we fail.
When you take part in NoFap/NoPorn, this crucial idea REMAINS. So if anything, doing nofap becomes this difficult task of rolling a boulder up a mountain! After all, we are actively fighting against something that helps us relieve us of our stress, boredom, anxiety, loneliness, etc!
So what is the answer? Is it to take on substitutes like exercising and meditation and cold showers? No.
The answer to this conundrum is to see through the LIE! The lie tells us that porn helps us deal with stress, boredom, anxiety, etc of life... This is a complete lie!!!
Porn doesn't relieve us of these things...porn actually either CAUSES it or CONTRIBUTES to it!
How?
Every time you fap, watch porn, your brain goes on a wild ride of chemistry. Once you crash from it and become more desensitized, your brain is LESS able to be happy, to cope with the normal challenges of life. As a result, your baseline wellness goes down. Your baseline becomes lower and lower with each session/viewing of porn. Yes, even just "edging" to it takes you down the same path. Your brain becomes flooded.
So of course when you PMO, you get this burst of unnatural stimulus in your brain so you do feel a bit better. But you're still worse off than before. It's like banging your head on the wall constantly so you can feel the "release" of stopping!
With each viewing of porn, you create a bigger void than you fill.
Once you can FULLY get this, porn will no longer hold any power over you. It will not take ANY effort to quit it at all. It will be effortless.
Porn doesn't relieve misery, it causes it!
Therefore, there are NO benefits to porn at all. Even the ones you held on to about porn being able to help you with your stress, anxiety, boredom, loneliness, etc. Porn only contributes to it!
This is exactly what the entire NoFap thread is missing! They are all fighting against porn. They are "resisting it". They are counting days they haven't fapped. But all this still ends up assuming that porn is something good! So of course after their 30-60-90 day streak, how do they celebrate? THEY WATCH PORN!
This misses the entire point! Until there is some benefit seen in porn, you will keep failing. I can't even get into the profound ways this clouds our ability to engage with life.
Anyways! That's all I got. I know I threw a lot of stuff out here, and I'm happy to clarify further as needed. I actually spent the last few weeks coaching a few men for free to see if this can work for them to quit porn. And the results look very very positive.
I'm now free from this poison and am happy to answer more questions about this approach with others. I am putting together a longer ebook as well to help as many men quit this once and for all!
Please let me know how I can help you.
